Relics

Rude Tales of Magic

Bucket of Milk

Comedy Fiction, Leisure, Comedy, Fiction

4.9 • 1.3K Ratings

🗓️ 8 November 2022

⏱️ 86 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

A man walks down the street He says, "Why am I soft in the middle now? Why am I soft in the middle? The rest of my life is so hard I need a photo-opportunity I want a shot at redemption Don't want to end up a cartoon In a cartoon graveyard" Bonedigger, Bonedigger Dogs in the moonlight Far away, my well-lit door Mr. Beerbelly, Beerbelly Get these mutts away from me You know, I don't find this stuff amusing anymore If you'll be my bodyguard I can be your long lost pal I can call you Betty And Betty, when you call me You can call me Al.

Transcript

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0:00.0	This is a headgum podcast.
0:07.0	Ah, there you are, traveller.
0:12.0	Come inside to hang up your couch,
0:15.0	put your feet by the fire
0:18.0	and I shall bring you what you so desperately seek.
0:24.0	Rude tales of magic.
0:33.0	Welcome back to Rude Tales of Magic.
0:35.0	Having defeated the virtuous bandits by their own logic,
0:38.0	our heroes venture onward through the regal and clean James Woods
0:42.0	on their journey back to Polaris University.
0:45.0	The air here is crisp and clean,
0:47.0	the trees enormous and sky-touching,
0:50.0	their girth note worthy.
0:52.0	Your path stretches forward,
0:54.0	and even occasionally cuts directly through massive trees
0:57.0	which power overhead.
0:59.0	You pass an enormous skeleton laying in a crater
1:01.0	of humanoid shape,
1:02.0	thousands of feet above in the crisp sky,
1:05.0	a pillowy cloud sits stationary
1:07.0	with an open trap door of cloud stuff.
1:10.0	A fancy gilded sign with disproportionately large first letters
	...

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