Vyashiv, refusing comfort, keeping hope. The deception has taken place. Joseph has been sold into slavery.

His brothers dipped his coat in blood. They brought it back to their father saying, look, what we've found, do you recognize it? Is this your son's robe or not?

Jacob recognizes it and replies, it's my son's robe or not? Jacob recognizes it and replies,

It's my son's robe.

A wild beast has devoured him.

Joseph has been torn to pieces.

We then read,

Jacob tore his clothes, put on sackcloth,

and mourned his son for a long time.

His sons and daughters tried to comfort him, but

via ma'en leitmachem.

He refused to be comforted.

He said, I will go down to the grave mourning for my son.

There are laws in Judaism about the limits of grief.

Shiva, Shloshim, a year. There's no such thing as a bereavement for which grief

is endless. The Talmud says that God admonish is one who weeps beyond the appointed time. You are not

more compassionate than I. And yet Jacob refused to be comforted. A midrash gives a remarkable explanation.

One can be comforted for one who is dead, it says, but not for one who is still living.

In other words, Jacob refused to be comforted because he had not yet given up hope that Joseph was still alive.

That tragically is the fate of those who've lost members of their family,

the parents of soldiers missing in action, for example,

but have as yet no proof that they're dead.

...