Pain is the reason people change and uncomfortableness is how we grow. I think the worst thing that can happen in a loving relationship is to try to take away their pain.

It seems so counterintuitive to the act of love, but to minimize or tell them it's just going to be okay rather than sit with it and witness it and hold space for them to fall into a thousand pieces, cry until they don't want to cry anymore, or to get

pissed off or whatever it might be, but just to hold space and witness it, that's where healing

takes place at a deep level is a radical gift of love. Okay, welcome back or welcome to another ask me anything on finding mastery.

I am your host, Dr. Michael Jervay by trade and training a high

performance psychologist. And the purpose behind these conversations,

behind these amas, is to hear from you to explore the topics and questions that you've been wrestling with on your path of becoming.

So we're back with our favorite co-host O'Neil Cespedes.

And in today's conversation we explore topics like how to

redefine failure. Why facing your deepest pains can be a transformative

experience, how to overcome defensiveness in order to establish

meaningful connections, why parents need to focus on more than just their child's academic

achievements, of course there's so much more in here. more than just their child's academic achievements.

Of course, there's so much more in here.

We love these conversations.

We love to do this.

And it's because we get to wrestle with the questions

that matter most to you. They're incredible. Thank you

for challenging us with these questions and please keep them coming. So with that, let's dive right into

volume 19 of Finding masteries, ask me anything.

AMA 19, here we go.

19.

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