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Our next reddit post is from bourgeois mystics. Last night I came home and walked into the kitchen,

where my mother-in-law and wife are standing with an enormous bag of small,

carrot-shaped white-root vegetables. Exhausted from a long day, I abs and mindedly ask,

are those white carrots? The existence of radishes temporarily eluding my consciousness.

My mother-in-law and wife, an enthusiastic unison chime in that, yes, they are indeed carrots.

Go ahead and try one. My mother-in-law encourages me with an over-zealousness that brings me to my senses.

No, no, those aren't carrots, but okay. Game on, mama, game on. I'll eat this raw root vegetable

and get you to as well. I rinse one off and snack into it as my wife and mother-in-law attempt

to stifle their giggles. I feign confusion at their reaction. What are you guys laughing about?

My wife laughs. What's it taste like? A carrot, I say? Maybe a little less sweet.

You're lying, my mother-in-law shoots back. The lady who gave them to me said their radishes.

My face betrays nothing. I'm ignoring the pungent peppery taste in my mouth,

and my face shows only an earnest mask of enjoyment. The sporadic laughter for my wife and mother-in-law

has ceased. I said, well, I don't know who said that, but it definitely tastes like a carrot.

...