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r/Choosingbeggars I WANT A FREE HOUSE!

rSlash

rSlash Reads Reddit

Comedy

4.910.6K Ratings

🗓️ 20 September 2023

⏱️ 17 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

0:00 Intro 0:08 Crazy request 1:11 Place to stay 2:04 Haggling 2:53 Olive Garden 5:24 Racist lady 8:01 Attack 9;12 Just say no 14:33 Free isn't easy enough Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

The Whole Foodie Festival is on at Whole Foods Market through October 3rd.

0:04.6

Save on hundreds of culinary favorites, like delectable cheeses, crackers,

0:08.8

charcuterie, olives and chocolates for that perfectly elevated snack board,

0:13.2

class up the party even more with short ribs, caviar and produce on sale,

0:17.9

and save on a huge selection of wine, including those made with organically grown grapes.

0:22.8

Starting at $6.99, check out the Whole Foodie Festival today.

0:26.6

Terms apply must be 21 plus. Please drink responsibly.

0:30.0

Welcome to our slash-choosing beggars, where you have to pay someone else $300 to be their

0:35.7

live-in nurse. Post it to Facebook. Hello, please no negative comment and no referrals to a

0:42.2

nursing home or assisted living. I'm a 50-year-old woman looking for a room to rent with my own

0:47.6

bathroom and off-street parking in a home that's kept clean, has a walk-in shower with safety bars,

0:52.9

no pets and no kids for $300, or less than that per month, including utilities and

0:59.6

within walking distance to stores and restaurants. No part-years, drug addicts are liars.

1:05.5

Preferably, what? Preferably with a nurse that can do daily wound dressings.

1:12.8

Okay, uh, I don't know what daily wound dressings is. Does that mean that you have to get

1:18.5

bandages and wrap up this 50-year-old lady's gross oozing wounds?

1:24.2

Oh god, you couldn't pay me $300 a month to just do the wound dressing. Let alone rent

1:29.6

out an apartment that also has, you know, all these amenities and utilities included for

1:34.2

$300 a month. Lady, I don't think your wounds are the problem. I think you've got brain damage.

1:39.7

Post it to Facebook. I may need somewhere to stay this week. I'm not giving details,

1:45.1

it's no one's business. I have two kids that come with me, and I have no car, but I can arrange

1:50.8

transportation myself. Just a couple of nights till I get this stuff sorted out. I have no money

...

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