Principal Takes a Holiday
Mom Can't Cook! A DCOM Podcast
Luke Westaway & Andy Farrant
5.0 • 944 Ratings
🗓️ 15 September 2025
⏱️ 127 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
John Scaduto has a problem. If he can get through the school term without getting in trouble, he stands to get a $10,000 check from his grandma. Unfortunately, he has already set into motion an epic prank that will maim his headmaster and earn him up to one demerit on his permanent record. But when his headmaster is incapacitated by a second, unrelated Scaduto attack, John realises that the answer to his problem is simple: hire a random drifter to pretend to be the Principal and hope against hope that he doesn't turn out to be some kind of sex criminal.
Enter Fitz, a free-spirited traveller who takes on the role of Dr Vernon Baxter, the substitute Principal, in exchange for some drumsticks and the chance to mess with the system. But before long, Fitz's methods are causing anarchy at the school, plus about 14 other plot lines that I don't really have the space to go into here. But can John reign in Fitz's anarchic spirit and bring the school back under control? Why is there a second Vernon Baxter running around? And why is there a THIRD Vernon Baxter running around? Listen and find out!
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | I'm a fish boy who skates for team X-blades with a leprechaun who plays basketball. |
| 0:09.0 | Come to my smart house. |
| 0:11.0 | My alien sister don't come hungry because I'll bet my mom can't cook cook Hello everyone and welcome to |
| 0:25.1 | Mum Can't Cook a decom podcast |
| 0:26.5 | I'm one of your hosts Andy Farrant and I'm sorry to say that your other host |
| 0:30.2 | Luke Westaway was unfortunately injured quite badly |
| 0:33.1 | this week he fell out of a window and landed on his bum |
| 0:36.5 | and he broke his bum and he broke his bum. |
| 0:37.7 | And he's had to go to the bum hospital. |
| 0:40.2 | So he unfortunately will not be able to podcast today. |
| 0:42.7 | But don't worry, I have a substitute podcaster being sent over from the Podcasting Institute. |
| 0:48.8 | Apparently they're very highly credentialed, very well respected. |
| 0:53.1 | So I imagine they'll arrive in a moment and bring some professionalism to this, to this |
| 0:58.6 | damn thing for once. |
| 1:00.0 | Oh, here they are now coming in the door. |
| 1:02.7 | Oh, sorry. |
| 1:04.0 | Jesus Christ. |
| 1:04.8 | I poorly shouldn't have. |
| 1:06.0 | I shouldn't have. |
| 1:06.9 | Sorry. |
| 1:08.2 | Yeah. |
| 1:08.8 | Microphones over there. |
... |
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