pressing rewind
Delusional Diaries
PodcastOne
4.1 • 1.3K Ratings
🗓️ 5 March 2026
⏱️ 53 minutes
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Summary
this week on Delusional Diaries, we’re hitting rewind for a full-on highlights episode: a chaotic, unfiltered compilation of the moments that define this podcast. from petty friendship fights (the anxiety spiral of a “hi” text with no follow-up, pregame arrival time wars, and who actually respects whose schedule) to brand trip beach blowups and influencer grudges that have lasted literal years, nothing is left out. the girls revisit the almost-move-to-florida era, the signed lease, the shared one-bedroom plan, the horse girl volunteer dreams, and how brand trips, boyfriends, and life completely rerouted everything.
of course, it wouldn’t be delusional diaries without the unhinged domestic lore: caffeine addictions and diet coke dependencies, coffee-fueled aggression, eating dog treats as a “sweet treat,” hotel room roommate nightmares, injuring-a-bunny-by-proxy (rip), and the ongoing debate about which dogs are draft picks versus practice squad. they unpack patience (or the lack of it), marathon hypotheticals for cash, chaotic family holidays, and what happens when your boyfriend’s entire extended family listens to your very explicit podcast.
but woven through the madness are the moments that made this show what it is: opening up about worst eras, mental health lows, therapy, imposter syndrome versus delusional confidence, and what it means to grow up publicly in your 20s. this episode is Delusional Diaries, wrapped into one very on-brand recap. if you’re an old listener, we know you’ll love revisiting these moments. if you’re new here, this is your perfect entry point into the rollercoaster.
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Hi, guys. Welcome back to Delusional Diaries podcast. I'm Hallie. And I'm Jazz. Jazz has been really |
| 0:17.0 | annoying me recently with this one specific thing. Jazz has been your... |
| 0:22.3 | You're just... |
| 0:22.6 | You've done this like twice very frequently. She will text... Twice and frequently should |
| 0:28.5 | not be in the same sentence. I'm sorry. |
| 0:29.8 | Twice. What's the word? Not... Back to back? Like very close together. Yes. Like you did this |
| 0:34.9 | like a week ago. She texts me last night. Hi. I immediately clicked the message. Like I saw it on my phone. I clicked the message. I go, hey, what's up? No response for like 20 minutes. I send another question marks. I'm like, all right, who text somebody? Hi, the person responds immediately. And then you don't think I'm like, it makes me anxious. I'm like, what is she trying to say? And then you didn't like i'm like it makes me anxious i'm like what is she |
| 0:54.9 | trying to say and then you didn't respond for the entire night until the next morning then you're like |
| 0:58.9 | hey good morning and i'm like what did you want like and you were so mad at me you did that to me |
| 1:05.4 | because it makes me anxious when somebody's like hi like you're like whenever there's anything that's |
| 1:09.7 | like serious i always facetime you so like me texting you hi should not be but you were you were at an event so i'm not thinking you're going to facetime me if it's like whatever i don't know it's just like what's going on like did somebody make a video about me and i can't see it and you're trying to like soft launch it like i would never text you high for that i don't know and you did that like the week before too where you were like, |
| 1:33.0 | guess what I'm doing tomorrow? I go, what? Zero response. And then I'm like, you're not going to tell me, didn't respond. And then you like told like hours later, then you finally answered. |
| 1:37.3 | I'm like, I literally messaged you back immediately. And I just know you're on your phone. |
| 1:41.9 | What was your go-to movie you would watch it a sleepover growing up i don't know i feel like we'd just go on omegal like that is so fucked up i know it i literally get sick thinking about it no if my kid was in my basement doing some shit like that i'd be like the fuck how are the parents not knowing about this i'm confused like i guess like social media like wasn't you but how was there no like facebook group saying hey is anyone struggling with their kids getting on a meagle yeah like wasn't don't you check your internet history like you know what i'm like because it was never brought up any of my friend's house any parents no one ever talked about it no one |
| 2:17.7 | knew also like maybe they just saw it and were like oh like I don't know if they knew but that was like |
| 2:23.3 | scary I saw so many penises I know so many it was like and I didn't even know what a penis was at |
| 2:30.3 | the time me neither so I was just like what is happening I hadn't even had my first kiss yet |
| 2:33.4 | and I remember like I think back to like. So I was just like, what is happening? I hadn't even had my first kiss yet. And I remember like, I think back to like, no, same. |
| 2:37.5 | I was so far as my first. |
| 2:38.1 | Also, like, those were pedophiles on there. |
| 2:40.0 | They're pedophiles. |
| 2:40.4 | They all need to be in jail. |
... |
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