Welcome to the Daily Dad podcast, where we provide one lesson every single day to help you with your most important job, being a parent.

I'm Ryan Holiday, and I draw these lessons from ancient philosophy, modern psychology, practical wisdom, and insights from

parents just like you all over the world. Thank you for listening, and we hope this helps.

Hey, it's Ryan. Welcome to another episode of The Daily Dad podcast. Today's episode is sponsored by Hoka.

Hoka's mock sixes have been a daily wear for many of us in the holiday family. I have a pair.

My wife has a pair. They even sent matching mock sixes for my two boys. So we've all got a matching set.

We don't all wear them at the same time. We space

it out, but they're a great shoe. To learn more about the kids' mock six shoe, visit today's

show notes. Check it out. Please, please don't do this. It's a very sad story, one we've told here many times. It was the story of the editor, Sunny Meta's father. It was Ted Williams. It was countless other parents,

parents who never expressed affection, who said harsh things to their kids, who never seemed to be

proud of them. Yet what did their kids find after their parents died? All the evidence to the

contrary. We talked recently about how the actor Alfred Molina, whose father just couldn't understand why, let alone how his son could make it as an actor, and how even now at age 71 and a parent himself, Molina still tears up at the feeling that he disappointed his dad by pursuing an unconventional career.

My father and I never really talked about my work, he told Vanity Fair. He wasn't phoning me up, saying, so what are you up to? What's going on? We never had that kind of relationship. When he passed away, I went to Spain for the funeral, and I was with his widow, my stepmom, and she drags out this suitcase. And it's full of clippings and photos and bits for magazines and letters from people that wrote to him saying they saw me. He kept all this stuff, but he never talked about it.

It's tragic and sweet at the same time.

It's also so, so preventable.

Don't be an idiot. Tell your kids how proud you are of them.

Collect press clippings following from afar. Just tell them that you love them.

Tell them you are wrong for doubting them. Explain that you were scared. Do the work to repair, as we've talked about many times. Malina was asked by his father's wife if he wanted to keep the scrapbooks. He said, no, it was too painful. But we could imagine he would have killed for a letter in his 20s and 30s. He ached for any evidence that his father was proud that he wasn't a disappointment. They want just one thing from you, as we've said. They want to know that you see them, that you love them, that you're rooting for them. Give it before it's too late. And this idea that you have to be your kid's biggest supporter is so important. I dedicated a whole month to it, actually the month of August, which is coming up in the Daily Dad book. You can grab that. The Daily Dad 366 meditations on parenting love and raising great kids. That chapter for August is titled Always Be a Fan. And as we said, it's the best gift you can give your kids. And it's also a good gift you can give to someone else, the book that is. If you want a sign copy, you can grab that at store.daily.com or swing by the painted porch.

Or grab it anywhere. Books are sold.

I think you'll love it. I'm really proud of it. And thanks for listening to The Daily Dad. You know,