Phone Tap: A.I. Says STFU
Brooke and Jeffrey: Phone Taps
iHeartPodcasts
4.7 • 880 Ratings
🗓️ 17 March 2026
⏱️ 5 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Bot Week rolls on! Today’s Phone Tap victim just wants to know when he can pick up his order, but thanks to Artificial Intelligence, that has literally never been more impossible!
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Bot week continues on Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning, where all week long, we're doing prank calls featuring AI robot voices as our chaotic little helpers. |
| 0:10.3 | And today we call a guy who ordered some lumber from a home improvement store. |
| 0:15.1 | He's been told the pickups happening tomorrow, but hasn't heard a specific time yet. |
| 0:19.6 | Okay. |
| 0:20.1 | That seems simple enough, Jeff. |
| 0:21.6 | And that's why Jose is calling to fill him in |
| 0:23.8 | with the help of his friendly robo assistant |
| 0:27.3 | to make this transaction go extra smooth |
| 0:30.9 | or extra awkward and horrible. |
| 0:33.9 | We'll find out which it is in your phone tap right now. |
| 0:36.9 | Brooke and Jeffrey's phone taps on the 20s. |
| 0:40.8 | Hello? |
| 0:42.1 | Hey, this is Dylan from home. |
| 0:43.8 | Is this Gary Dachshund? |
| 0:45.9 | Yes, it is. |
| 0:47.0 | Good morning, Gary. I'm calling. It looks like you have a lumber pickup scheduled for |
| 0:51.6 | tomorrow. Is that correct? |
| 0:53.8 | Yeah. Thank you. But, you know, I was a little confused about the timing. When can I come by and pick that up? No problem. Let me just take a look at the calendar real quick. Generating schedule for pickup. Okay. That's... Generating schedule for pickup. What is that? I'm sorry, what? What was that sound? Was that you? Generating schedule for pickup. Oh, that. No, that, for some reason the company decided to install this, like, smart AI system, you know, into all of our customer calls. Wow. Okay. But, I mean, they still want that human element, so that's why I'm here. Okay. Two for the price of one. Yeah. You know? Kind of crazy, but, yeah, whatever. You're telling me. Anyway, back to your schedule. Let's, it looks like. Generating schedule for pickup. It says you can pick up your lumber at one o'clock. So that'll be correct. |
| 2:04.0 | Wait. Wait, wait, wait, wait, hang on. I'm sorry. Going on here. What time? I think it's one o'clock. That's incorrect. What the heck is going on? Okay. Do I like coming at one or do I not? No, don't come in at one. I realize now it's looking at one 15 is when you're |
| 2:03.6 | supposed. That's wrong too. What? I'm sorry. This doesn't really happen a lot. |
| 2:08.6 | That's incorrect. Wait, hang on. I guess it does happen a lot. |
| 2:13.6 | Can you do me a favor? What is your name again? |
... |
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