Welcome back to the Look and Sound of Leadership, an ongoing series of

executive coaching tips designed to help you be perceived in the workplace the way

you want to be perceived. I'm Tom Henschel, your executive coach, and today

we're talking about perception is reality. Andrew wanted to be a vice president.

During our very first conversation Andrew wanted to be a vice president.

During our very first conversation, he told me flat out,

he wanted the coaching to help him get promoted.

I said, great, I hoped we could make that happen.

I also told him what his boss Lauren had told me.

She's concerned, I said, that you don't see yourself the way others see you.

Until that gap is closed, she says she can't support your promotion.

Yeah, he said, she's told me that, but I think she's wrong.

I smiled at the irony. His inability to see himself the way others did appeared to be

showing itself already. Weeks later I presented him with the feedback I

had collected about him. In the section from the company's executives were words like

passionate and tireless. In the section from his team words cropped up like

argumentative and impatient. Andrew protested, I'm no different with the executives than I am with my team.

What if you were, I suggested?

Are you saying I should be different with the execs than I am with my team?

No, I'm not saying that. Your team is saying that you are different.

Well, how do I make them see that I'm not impatient? I'm just passionate. I wondered if Andrew would

ever be able to see that until he accepted his team's perception of him as impatient, he wouldn't be able to change their perception.

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