This is Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby, and you're listening to the Love, Happiness, and Success Podcast.

That's the song People Pleaser from Austin Archer, off his album, Beautiful Things.

I'm so glad you've joined us today because this is a very special episode.

Today, we're going to be talking about people pleasing, which I know is something that we all struggle with from time to time.

I'm guessing that if you're like basically everybody else in the universe, that every once in a while

you might agree to do things that you don't really want to do just to make somebody else happy,

or if you've ever accepted blame for something that you knew wasn't really your fault,

just to keep the peace and put things behind you. Things like that, you know,

many of us engage in those behaviors once in a while. And there's not anything terribly wrong with doing that sometimes.

This can be kind of social lubricant, right?

People are good at relationships, pick their battles.

And sometimes it's a good idea to avoid conflict or keep things pleasant and positive.

But the problem arises when the balance tips too far in the direction

of your people pleasing a lot of the time when it starts to turn into a pattern for you

on the way you engage with others. Because when that starts to happen, it stops being harmless.

You know, if you have a hard time telling people no or disagreeing with other people or sometimes even putting yourself first, it can start to feel like all of your time or energy is being swallowed up by other people's priorities.

And that's not good for you.

You know, it can start to feel angry or resentful

or might even spend so much of your time and energy taking care of other people that you're not

doing a good job of taking care of yourself. So if this isn't feeling a little bit familiar for you,

I'm glad you're here listening to this episode because today I'm joined by my colleague Kathleen Carroll, who is a therapist and a life coach

here on her team at Growing Self. And she is such an expert in helping people build happy,

...