People have a guard up to hide insecurities and protect their hearts.

How do you get past this?

That's an easy question to answer.

You've got to create rapport.

Take a sincere, authentic interests in other people.

Like we were just talking about in the last question, these are like basic sales skills 101.

Because if you're thinking about buying a product

of any kind or any kind of service, you have to deal with some kind of salesperson or account

executive or some kind of rep. And everybody's on guard when you do that. And people that are

really good in sales understand that you want to create the conditions

where they don't feel like they're talking to a salesman they feel like they're talking to a friend

somebody that they already know and so when you take a sincere authentic interest in the other human

being instead of giving them their sale the sales pitch you want to give them you take the time

just to ask them questions,

the kind of questions they would enjoy answering. What do they love to do for fun? What are

their hopes? What are their dreams? What types of things do they do socially when they're not

working? What are their hobbies? What are their interests? Ask them about their friends,

their family. Where are they grew up? These are the kinds of things you ask if you care

about the other person. And so it's very

disarming to other people when you don't come off as a salesperson or somebody trying to sell them

something, you know, or a dude that is just trying to get in her pants. If you're just hanging out

and you're shooting the shit and you're talking, it feels natural. You feel like you're hanging out with somebody that you already know.

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