Welcome to Breaking Out Patriarchy. I'm Amy McPhee, all the best. As a mother, I have received lots of

parenting advice over the years. Some of that advice was helpful and wanted, and plenty of it wasn't,

but nowhere in the books or articles or casual conversation did anyone ever mention how

patriarchy affects our parenting. Longtime listeners will know that

plenty of feminist scholars from Kate Millett to Anne-Marie Slaughter have written about patriarchy and

motherhood as interconnected concepts. But when it comes to practical parenting tips, what we should

and could actually do about patriarchy right now to prepare the next

generation. The sad truth is that most of the literature that's out there continues to reinforce

patriarchal norms of hierarchy, of power over, of punishment. Patriarchy says that one person must

always be dominant, writes parenting coach Jen Lumenlin.

She says, quote, white people over everyone else, the male in a heterosexual partnership.

And she adds the mother over the child.

You might be wondering with me then, how can we challenge these patriarchal parenting norms?

Are we really ready to let go of our power over our children and what alternatives are out there?

Well, I am very pleased to have a guest with us today who's going to help us answer all of these questions and many more.

She's a researcher, writer, and celebrated parenting coach, the one I just quoted.

Please join me in welcoming Jen Lumilan, author of Parenting Beyond Power, How to Use Connection and Collaboration

to Transform Your Family and the World. Welcome, Jen. Thanks. It's so great to be here with you.

Jen Lumilan, MSM ed, obtained bachelor's degrees in forestry in English from the University of

California, Berkeley, and a master's in environmental management from Yale University and enjoyed

a career in sustainability consulting before having her daughter when she realized she was in for

her toughest challenge yet. She went back to school for a master's in psychology,

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