Do you want to be affirmed by your spouse or do you need to be affirmed by your spouse?

I'm John Fuller along with Dr. Greg Smalley and his wife Aaron

they lead the focus marriage team and Aaron it's kind of dangerous when we

identify anything from my spouse as a need, but how about affirmation? I mean words of

affirmation. Is it a need? I would say no. I would say it's a strong desire.

We long to hear affirmation from our spouse.

But where we get into trouble is when we're demanding it

and we're like, you have to affirm me.

How excited is your spouse going to be to affirm you?

The problem is we can't control what they do or don't do

and therefore we're helpless over here because we can't make them do anything.

Well, if it's a real need, she'll just affirm me.

Right?

Well, what I would say is I like that.

I feel loved when you affirm me.

I want you to affirm me, but it really goes back to who do I have

control of and that's me. I can always affirm me. I can also look to God to affirm me.

Yeah, well, we're going to hear some more on this topic as focused on the family president

Jim Daly talked with Dr. Michael Seizma.

He and Chanti Feldenhan have done some great research about couples and sexuality and communication and today Michael addresses why it's not your spouse's job to make you feel good.

Let me, and I think people are going, wow, yeah, I feel that.

So I think that's going to resonate.

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