Overthinking About Crushes

Magical Overthinkers

Amanda Montell & Studio71

Education, Science, Society & Culture

4.3 • 636 Ratings

🗓️ 21 August 2024

⏱️ 55 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Before the internet, getting lost in a spiral of romantic, obsessive feelings for someone was already an all-consuming experience… but now? With algorithmic dating apps and the ability to overanalyze everyone watching your Instagram Stories, crushes in the digital age are ripe for delulu. In some cases, they might even pose a threat to IRL human connection. This week on the pod, OCD specialist Alegra Kastens (@alegrakastens) joins host Amanda Montell (@amanda_montell) for an open-hearted, all-too-relatable discussion of limerence, neurodivergence, and how crushes have combined with the social media era to produce a perfectly chaotic cocktail of magical overthinking. - Join the "Magical Overthinkers Club" by following the pod on Instagram @magicaloverthinkers. - To access early, ad-free episodes and more, subscribe to the Magical Overthinkers Substack. - Pick up a hard copy of Amanda's book The Age of Magical Overthinking: Notes on Modern Irrationality, or listen to the audiobook. - Sources: What causes a crush to develop? - bit.ly/3Z0G4SC Is it a crush or have you fallen into limerence? - nyti.ms/3WS2KSB Why your internet crush can be stronger than your in-person feelings - bit.ly/3WWRIv9 Office crushes can be fun and excruciating - bit.ly/4dUhvvc Why crushes are so common, and healthy, at all ages - bit.ly/3Xc1fzT To watch the podcast on YouTube: https://bit.ly/MagicalOverthinkersYouTube ; Don’t forget to subscribe to the podcast for free wherever you're listening If you like the show, telling a friend about it would be amazing! You can text, DM, email, or send this link to a friend: https://bit.ly/MagicalOverthinkers Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	Welcome to the Magical Overthinkers podcast, a show for thought spirallers, exploring the subjects we can't stop overthinking about, from imposter syndrome to monogamy.
0:17.3	If you can connect to the idea that despite living in the information age, life only seems to be making less sense.
0:24.4	If you often find yourself confounded by the feeling that it just feels especially hard to exist as a human in the world right now, then you're in the right place.
0:34.3	This podcast is here to soften the clash between our innate human
0:39.3	mysticisms and the overwhelm of this time. I'm your host, Amanda Montel. Today, we're overthinking
0:47.0	about crushes. I have to make a bit of a confession.
0:55.1	The idea for today's podcast episode occurred to me while I was a little bit tipsy,
1:00.8	walking home all by myself from this tiny little old-timey bar in Asheville, North Carolina,
1:08.1	a set of circumstances that set me up perfectly to indulge in a bit of overthinking
1:13.6	about an old crush. Specifically, and this is kind of a dark story, the fact that my single
1:21.4	most formative adolescent crush from middle school died a year and a half ago from a fentanyl overdose.
1:29.1	I have not seen this person since I was 14 years old, but I can't stop thinking about how
1:33.1	I'll never see him again. In a way, it almost felt like a piece of my girlhood was taken
1:39.2	away from me when I got the news that he had passed away. And so tragically, too, he was only 31.
1:45.9	And when I knew him, we met at theater camp.
1:49.0	He was like the one cute straight boy at theater camp.
1:52.8	It's a type.
1:54.1	He just seemed like on top of the world, the dreamiest person alive.
1:58.6	He was beautiful and funny and talented,
2:00.5	and I didn't know a single
2:02.2	girl at that camp who was not completely enamored with him. I think he really shaped the type of
2:08.2	person that I would end up developing crushes on for the rest of my life. I found out about the
	...

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