Our Quibbles with Squibs

Plumbing the Death Star

Sanspants Radio

Tv & Film, Comedy

4.7 • 1.4K Ratings

🗓️ 1 December 2014

⏱️ 29 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

In which our heroes fail to exhibit any magical tendencies, are barred from attending Hogwarts, and become janitors as we wonder where Squibs fit into the Harry Potter Universe. We discuss Filch's unfortunate situation, Wizard genetics, Wizard medical procedures and the double standard of Mudbloods and Squibs. Jackson wonders how many Hermiones there are, Zammit gets existential about paintings, and Duscher just assumes he'd be a Wizard no matter what. It's an unfortunate, scramble for a job suitable for a Squib as we avoid being Squid shamed and watch all the cool kids learn magic while we can’t even learn how to mix a potion or tame a dragon. Want to help us enrol in Wizarding Community College? Head to http://www.patreon.com/sanspantsradio and for as little as $1 a month, you can help make a difference in our magicless lives.

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Transcript

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0:00.0	Short clips of this bullshit now on Tik-Tok.
0:03.8	Watch it too much and make us go viral.
0:06.0	Now on, help ruin other people's days.
0:08.6	Just search for plumbing the Death Star on Tik-Tok
0:10.8	and don't forget to like, comment and follow so we can trick that
0:14.1	algorithm into thinking that any of this is good.
0:22.4	This is a passenger announcement. You can now book your train on Uber and get 10% back in credits to spend on Uber.
0:32.0	So you can order your own fries instead of eating everyone else's.
0:36.0	Trains, now on Uber. T's and C's apply, check the Uber app.
0:41.0	Just imagine what your best Christmas ever would sound like.
0:45.0	Thank you for calling National Lottery.
0:46.0	I can see you calling about a winner today, is that correct?
0:49.0	Yeah, I think I have.
0:50.0	I'll just take to double check for I do a cartwheel.
0:52.0	Yeah, I can confirm that you have won the top prize 1.2 million.
0:56.3	Oh my what! Happy Christmas! Why do no?
1:00.0	You have the best Christmas ever.
1:06.0	This Christmas, it could be you. The National Lottery.
1:07.0	Rules and procedures apply.
1:09.0	Players must be 18 or over.
1:11.0	Sandstones Radio. or over. Strickland. Hey Samuel, let's hold hands.
1:22.6	Hey guys and welcome to another episode of Flomming the Death Eaters,
	...

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