4.7 • 3.8K Ratings
🗓️ 4 June 2018
⏱️ 13 minutes
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0:00.0 | Hi, this is Janet Lanzvery, welcome to Unruffled. |
0:05.7 | Today I'm going to be responding to a parent who has three children, but is mostly concerned |
0:11.0 | about his oldest who doesn't seem to follow instructions and has been acting out. |
0:17.3 | And the parents are using positive parenting, but it doesn't seem to be effective. |
0:22.1 | They're looking for what they might be missing. |
0:28.9 | Here's the letter I've received. |
0:30.2 | Dear Janet, I listen to your podcast regularly and I've heard multiple letters you've read |
0:35.0 | from parents with questions I have as well. |
0:37.9 | And now I have a question of my own. |
0:40.1 | My wife and I have three children ages four, two, and almost a month old. |
0:45.4 | My son who is four is normally a very sweet and caring child, and we've done the best we |
0:50.7 | can to follow the principles of positive parenting. |
0:53.8 | One of the issues we struggle with is what to do when our son refuses to follow our instructions |
0:58.1 | and begins to act out. |
1:00.3 | We don't approve of timeouts and we don't spank, but there are times when I feel that calmly |
1:04.8 | talking to him and using the phrases, I see that you want to do that and similar phrases |
1:10.5 | seems to have no effect. |
1:12.6 | The issue we struggle with often is him not listening at all and ignoring us and continuing |
1:17.9 | the behavior we say we can't allow, such as pulling his younger sister around, climbing |
1:23.0 | on his mom's back and shoulders while she's trying to care for the newborn. |
1:27.2 | This is a positive parenting method of dealing with a child where we're removing them from |
1:30.7 | the situation, talking to them about the behavior, explaining our expectations, trying to understand |
... |
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