Welcome to the Black Girl Burnout podcast, Kelly here.

And today we're going to talk about how to opt out of fighting.

Now, this episode makes me chuckle a little bit only because if you knew me five years ago,

10 years ago, my entire 20s, you would never expect an episode like this to come from me.

I mean, literally my name Kelly means in Gaelic warrior, fighter.

It can mean war in certain contexts.

So I quite literally was born to fight and have spent my entire life living up to that name.

And it wasn't until therapy and to some extent emotional maturity

and understanding that I want to opt out of struggle that I've healed my relationship around

the word fight and being a fighter and have come to a place of more peace about when to fight

and when to let go.

And that's really what this episode and this week's worth of episodes are about.

They are about the beauty in surrender and knowing when to let go.

And I feel like I'm in the place to tell you about this for many reasons, which I'll get into. But one, like I just said,

is because this feels like this has been my lifelong lesson is knowing when to let it go and when to

opt out of fighting. Now, again, fighting in itself isn't a bad thing. There are times where we have to fight.

Sometimes it's for the people we love, for the things we love, and most importantly,

sometimes it's for ourselves. Fighting can be an indicator about our self-esteem and what we

value. There are things we should fight for. There are

injustices in the world that are worth advocacy and fighting. But what I want to talk about today is

what happens when you get stuck into a pattern where your default response is to fight and how to opt out of that being

your default so that you are not locked in struggle and you can actually have the things that

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