Nurse Patrick learns beside manner
Bropostles
Ethan and Patrick
4.7 • 531 Ratings
🗓️ 17 July 2022
⏱️ 69 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Am I out of touch? No, its the parents who are wrong.
Today, Ethan and Patrick discuss Mark Walhberg single-handedly stopping 9/11, make some jokes with (not of) Hallow, and discover why youth ministry is failing. The answer may suprise you.
HUGE thanks to our three new patrons this week - we really appreciate it. When we lost Musician01, 02, and 03, we we’re starting to lose hope until Musican04 stepped up. Seriously though, thank you.
In a particuarly depressing Dr. Ethan’s Dating Corner, Nurse Patrick confuses some Cheeto dust for a malignant tumour and gets reprimanded by the good doctor.
If we get 6 new patrons before this upcoming Wednesday, Ethan will purchase his Chinese elderly lady neighbour an ice cream cone. If we don’t, Ethan will never buy her ice cream. Ever. Have a heart, dear listeners.
Follow us on Twitch (twitch.tv/thecrunchpodcast), join our popping Discord (bit.ly/crunchdiscord), and follow our other socials @thecrunchcast for more sweet, sweet content of whatever this is.
Producer Reagan
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Everybody is reading a column about high gas prices, but nobody's talking about the solemn high mass crisis. That's funny. Wait, did you do the ass crisis one? Huh? No, I didn't tweet the ass crisis one. I'm trying. I was just thinking about it. It's like, man, I'm trying to get sponsored by Hallow. And if they see my ass crisis post, will they sponsor me? What's up? I'm Mark Wahlberg. |
| 0:21.5 | I'm all prayed up. |
| 0:23.1 | Ready to start the day. |
| 0:25.9 | What's up? |
| 0:26.5 | It's Mark Wahlberg. |
| 0:27.4 | Got up at 4 a.m. this morning. |
| 0:28.9 | First thing I did was check out my muscles. |
| 0:32.0 | The second thing was check my app. |
| 0:33.8 | Hello. |
| 0:34.6 | The first thing I did was use my obscene wealth to have access to better not only health |
| 0:41.0 | care but also food and nutrition information and I used it to look like a demi, a Greek |
| 0:47.1 | demigod and now I play golf. |
| 0:49.6 | What's up? |
| 0:50.6 | I'm Mark Waldberg here on the set of Ted 3 coming right to straight to the |
| 0:55.7 | straight to Netflix and I I'm teaching the bear how to pray. |
| 1:04.6 | Sponsored by Hallow. |
| 1:05.7 | Since the 103 plot is just trying to get him to come to mass. |
| 1:13.8 | And he gets to mass and goes, hey, Mark, what the fuck is this? |
| 1:18.1 | That's the whole plot set of TED 3, here with my buddy, Ted. |
| 1:50.4 | Ted, why don't you tell the people what you think about Hallow? |
| 1:55.2 | If they did that, that would be the, I would download Hallow and I would pay for the full |
| 1:58.6 | premium subscription if that was their ad. That's what I would do. I would download Hallow and I would pay for the full premium subscription if that was their ad. |
... |
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