No Such Thing As The Doughnut Ambassador

No Such Thing As A Fish

Arts, Nature, History, Science, Improv, Comedy

4.8 • 17.9K Ratings

🗓️ 11 September 2025

⏱️ 57 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Dan, James, Anna and Andy discuss tractor tyres, doughnut dimples and protecting porpoises.

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Transcript

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0:00.0	Hello and welcome to a
0:03.3	Hello and welcome to another episode of no such thing in Hoburn.
0:19.4	My name is Dan Shriver. I'm sitting here with
0:21.6	Andrew Hunter Murray, James Harkin, and Anna Tyshinsky. And once again, we have gathered around
0:26.7	the microphones with our four favorite facts from the last seven days. And in a particular order,
0:31.4	here we go. Starting with fact number one, and that is Anna. My fact this week is that in the 1940s, a mystery man traveled America measuring the holes
0:42.1	in donuts and passing a ruling on what size they should be.
0:46.5	Pervert.
0:48.7	It's got pervert written all over it.
0:52.1	That didn't even cross my mind.
0:54.2	Now I'm looking down all my research from this guy and questioning his motives. Yeah, That didn't even cross my mind. And now I'm looking down all my research
0:55.7	from this guy and questioning his motives. Yeah, I didn't as well. Why is he a pervert? What's going on? It's weird having an obsession with measuring holes and putting him mucky little fingers in there. And like, what are you doing? Why's he got mucky fingers? Because they got sugar on them because of all the donuts. We don't know he wasn't a good hand washer.
1:11.4	In fact, we know almost nothing about him.
1:13.0	What was he measuring the holes with?
1:14.4	That's what I want to do. Because they got sugar on them because of all the donuts. We don't know he wasn't a good hand washer.
1:11.4	In fact, we know almost nothing about him.
1:13.0	What was he measuring the holes with?
1:14.3	That's what I want to know.
1:15.3	Come on, people.
1:16.9	Okay, now I get it.
1:19.6	Edward Falasker was a perfectly innocent donut aficionado.
1:23.9	And this, I started looking into this because there's a picture that occasionally pops up online of a man who's holding up a big sign with three pictures on it.
	...

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