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For The Love With Jen Hatmaker Podcast

No Such Thing As Good or Bad Kids: Dr. Shefali on Conscious Parenting

For The Love With Jen Hatmaker Podcast

Jen Hatmaker

Relationships, Society & Culture

4.66.3K Ratings

🗓️ 14 February 2025

⏱️ 55 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Title: No Such Thing As Good or Bad Kids: Dr. Shefali on Conscious Parenting Description: Today, we’re taking a trip into the archives to revisit a 2023 episode with renowned clinical psychologist and listener favorite, Dr. Shefali Tsabary, where we dove into the deeply-layered topic of conscious parenting. Those of us in the middle of life, still parenting kids at home, adjusting to parenting adult children who just launched out into the world. or in any season of the parenting journey, really, will find much to learn as we look back (and forward) at our parenting patterns. Highlights from this convo include: Defining conscious parenting and the three stages of the parenting map Debunking the notion that as parents we are supposed to create happy, perfect superhumans by following traditional parenting rules Dismissing the notion that there are good kids and bad kids—and how to avoid using these labels Revealing the five ego patterns that parents might not even realize inform their quest to raise amazing children The three reasons why children act out or misbehave and how you can learn not to shame them for it The results of over-parenting and how it shows up in your adult children How it’s never too late to become a mindful parent Segments: Bless and Release: Avoiding difficult conversations Thought-provoking Quotes: The evolution of the planet depends on the evolution of the parent. – Dr. Shefali Everyone wants a new tomorrow. But what we don’t realize is that a new future comes with an absolute willingness to disrupt the past. – Dr. Shefali There is no such thing as a good kid or a bad kid. So, what kind of kids are there? Just kids – just humans who are terribly flawed like we are, and terribly, but amazingly blissful like we are. They’re just this unique combo and they defy labels. – Dr. Shefali Punishment, shaming, blaming is never sustainable. I cannot tell you how many times a day I tell parents, ‘Listen, you appear to get control in the moment, but long term, it’s going to be unforgiving.’ – Dr. Shefali How do we constantly show our presence [to our adult children]? Unequivocal cheerleading. ‘I’m thinking of you. I miss you. I’m remembering you. I adore you.’ Let them know they are on your mind but not involved in their day-to-day. – Dr. Shefali When the ego crumbles, proportionately the heart expands, and you then are just this heart-centered being able to connect to the other people in a very attuned, compassionate, genuine way. And your children will feel it. – Dr. Shefali Resources Mentioned in This Episode: The Conscious Parent by Dr. Shefali Tsabary - https://amzn.to/4aNAPd8 The Parenting Map by Dr. Shefali Tsabary - https://amzn.to/3EER148 Dr. Shefali’s previous interview on For the Love:Releasing The Fantasy of “The Good Girl” with Dr. Shefali Tsabary - https://jenhatmaker.com/podcasts/series-35/releasing-the-fantasy-of-the-good-girl-with-dr-shefali-tsabary/ Guest’s Links: Dr. Shefali’s website - https://www.drshefali.com/ Dr. Shefali’s Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/doctorshefali Dr. Shefali’s Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/doctorshefali Dr. Shefali’s YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/c/DrShefali Dr. Shefali’s TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@doctorshefali Dr. Shefali’s Podcast - https://www.drshefali.com/podcast/ Connect with Jen! Jen’s website - https://jenhatmaker.com/ Jen’s Instagram - https://instagram.com/jenhatmaker Jen’s Twitter - https://twitter.com/jenHatmaker/ Jen’s Facebook - https://facebook.com/jenhatmaker Jen’s YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/user/JenHatmaker The For the Love Podcast is presen To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0

So meditation is something I added into my personal wellness toolkit a little over four years ago.

0:06.6

It's something I absolutely came to love. But for those who just can't hop on board the meditating

0:12.9

train right now, I want to share something called activations. I actually love complimenting, if you will, like my meditation practice with activations.

0:24.6

They're a little bit more energizing, like goal-oriented, like visualization-focused, which I love too.

0:32.7

They're designed for you to listen with your eyes open, like in everyday moments while you're just doing whatever.

0:38.0

And there's sort of a mix between a motivational podcast, cinematic, music, and guided visualizations.

0:47.7

The Activations app has incredible options. I've been integrating into my daily routine,

0:52.4

just as I go. And it's been pretty transformative.

0:55.8

Like I listen while I'm getting ready in the morning or winding down at night or like running an

1:02.0

errand. I'm in the car. It's a super easy but also effective way to get motivated and kind of

1:09.2

dial into your future self, if you will. So in the app, there are more

1:12.9

than 700 activations to choose from. I love personally that the music is so moving and the words are

1:19.6

empowering and it's all backed by science and self-image psychology. It's all fascinating. These activations

1:26.2

actually engage your reticular activating system

1:29.6

and help align your thoughts and actions with your goals. So give activations a try. You can get a

1:38.8

14-day free trial and they offer a money-back guarantee so you can try it out risk free and see if it's

1:44.3

right for you. With my link, you can also get a pretty massive discount of over 60% off your yearly

1:51.6

membership. So this offer is only available for a limited time. So head to activations.com

1:58.0

slash gin. And you could take advantage of this sale.

2:02.3

The deal is only available through this URL, not the app store.

2:06.6

So head over to activations.com slash gen and start your free trial.

2:11.8

It's the perfect way to step into the new year.

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