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Basketball Illuminati

Count The Dings

Basketball, Sports, Comedy

5 • 1.4K Ratings

🗓️ 9 April 2025

⏱️ 37 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Tom Haberstroh, Amin Elhassan and producer Anthony Mayes are working on their Parker Posey drawls to mock Duke's tough exit from the Final Four. Tonight is Luka Doncic's grand return to Dallas, and thanks to Marc Stein's reporting, a new influential figure has emerged in the sequence of events that led to the stunning trade. The Denver Nuggets stunningly cleaned house during our recording, firing Michael Malone (and GM Calvin Booth) with three games left in the regular season as the NBA continues to up the ante. Finally, master codebreaker Draymond Green is on the precipice of the greatest defensive play of his career: stealing the DPOY award from Evan Mobley's grasp because he spoke it into existence. Basketball Illuminati is now part of the Count The Dings Network. Join the Count The Dings Patreon to support the show, get ad free episodes and exclusive content at www.patreon.com/CountTheDings ILLUMINATI MERCH HAS RETURNED - Check it out here: https://bit.ly/CTDMERCH Subscribe to Basketball Illuminati! On Apple or Spotify Email us: [email protected] Twitter: @bballilluminati Instagram: @basketballilluminati Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	You need the news.
0:01.7	No one wants to be so uninformed.
0:03.8	People talk about how uninformed you are behind your back.
0:07.0	That's embarrassing.
0:08.8	But the news is boring, or at least how it's delivered is.
0:13.9	Until Hard Factor was formed, four lifelong friends and struggling comedians decided to bring you all the daily news you need
0:21.4	in irreverent and sometimes outright offensive fashion.
0:25.7	Cheat on the news for about 45 minutes every Monday through Friday with the 80% accuracy
0:31.2	guaranteed hard factor podcast found everywhere you find podcasts.
0:37.0	And most importantly, have a great fucking day.
0:41.6	No spoilers on this, but I feel like everyone's favorite part about White Lotus,
0:46.5	the season finale was this past Sunday.
0:49.2	The accents.
0:50.1	People are fascinated by North Carolina accents all of a sudden.
0:53.4	How did this happen? Yeah, where's yours, Tom? You've been underrepresenting North Carolina accents all of a sudden. How did this happen?
0:54.3	Yeah, where's yours, Tom?
0:55.5	Yeah.
0:55.9	You've been under-representing North Carolina here.
0:58.4	For real.
0:59.1	Tom, no.
1:00.6	My dog's name is Piper, so.
1:02.8	You're a Buddhist.
	...

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