We are now joined on Head in the Office by Corn Pop, someone we've been paying attention to for quite a long time across platforms. I believe we've been mutuals for a while. This will be a special little collab bonus episode where we're just going to shoot the shit about Iran, about DHS, and about a number of other things our fascist government is doing. So, Korn Pop, thanks for coming on and feel free to just throw whatever topics you got our way. Oh, absolutely. Well, first of all, to the head in the office, guys, I really appreciate you guys, been watching you guys for a couple years, and I, I honestly, it feels trippy to actually be talking to you because I think that especially in the last year, you guys have really hit your stride to the point where you guys are more than, I mean, on your way to getting like huge cred, I think. I appreciate Appreciate it. Appreciate it. I'm like only going to Jake her from here. I do have a couple of a bigger stories that I thought would be really funny for us to talk about. The first one I wanted to, like, really talk about was some reporting that Gage and I were speaking about a little bit before this call, which was that Reuters came out today and was like, Yeah, military officials in the United States can only confirm a third of Iran's entire missile arsenal has been depleted, and the other third is uncertain. And the fact that the same people who just keep coming out every day and like, no, we're winning, we're winning so bad. You can't even, you want us to stop winning, we're winning so bad. For them to now be like, we don't even know where the other third could be.

It really sparked a lot of questions in my mind and cheap among them, especially as I know you guys have been talking for the last couple weeks about the sort of quagmire unfolding in Iran, is if you guys both believe that genuinely that the Department of War just like hasn't learned any lesson since the Gulf War and like what you think sort of allows them to stand seriously in front of reporters and just say that with a straight base and not feel like utterly humiliated they are after spending four weeks now being like we destroyed 90% of their missile capacity 90% missile depreciation rate in terms of the rate of fire.

For them to now be like, yeah, it's, maybe it's a third. I don't know. Yeah. Yeah. I think the understanding that I've come to at least is that, well, first it's like, you know, first is tragedy, then as farce, farce upon farce upon farce upon, like that's all it is, right? But like Trump ran both times, I guess all three times, as the sort of like anti-war dove kind of guy, right?

Like I'm going to bring peace to the Middle East. I'm going to bring, well, first he said, I brought peace to the Middle East, and now he's saying he's bringing peace once again to the Middle East. But the truth is that they're no different than the neocons that they deride, right? The foreign policy is essentially identical, except for it's a lot more

belligerent this time around. The only difference is in the way that they talk about it, right?

I mean, there was that political story that we talked about a couple episodes ago where their

strategy for selling this war is literally just creating memes and posting them online.

Do the crazy shit. It is so deeply unsurious, but the foreign policy itself, going to war in the

Middle East for the sake of Israel or territorial expansion or military dominance, whatever it is,

the foreign policy is the same, impose our will on other countries so that we can get them to do

what we want. And beyond that, there's no plan to get out. There's no strategic goals. We're just there to be there. And so that's the conclusion I came to is that they're essentially the same as the neocons that they said they weren't, which I think a lot of people saw through, but not enough. Yeah, no, they really are just like the exact same as the old people, except they think that they're different. They think that somehow what they do, they're different. And we were talking before we started the recording, J.D. Vance, I believe it was last year after we launched the strike against Iran to destroy their nuclear capabilities and then at least that we didn't do any of that at all. He said something like, or even before that, just at one point last year, Jaddy Vance said, the wars in the Middle East didn't work because we had dumb presidents then and now we have a smart president. The irony is just insane, man. And it is, it is, it is like funny because all of this like in a way is kind of morbidly funny, watching them like fumble through anything, watching like the, the exhibition of people who have zero shame going to the media, talking about how how callously they're killing people without caring at all for what they say, the lies that they're giving out. And then you see the Reuters reporting that says, eh, we maybe got a third. We don't know about the middle third. And the other missiles, they're just kind of flying. Juxtaposing that with all the truth socials, all the press conferences, we complete victory, complete victory, total victory, guys were winning. Trump was at the cabinet meeting yesterday and he was like, they're begging us to end the

war. I don't think any of it's happening. Yeah, I was going to say, they're begging us to end the war.

Meanwhile, Iran is sending out mass text messages being like, we'll pay you $25 million US dollars

to kill the president of the United States.

And, you know, with them, with the idea that they really think they're different, though,

I just think that that's so bananas to even be able to maintain that level of delusion.

Because meanwhile, you have people like Mark Carney, openly being like, we got to figure out another way for global trade to work.

Because clearly the United States is going to blow all the shit up. And we all want to make money in the global north. There's no future where the United States is the linchpin and all this shit anymore. And also, for all these people, like Pete Hakeseth and Rubio and J.D. Vance to co-sign the idea of like every single conservative administration in the past was just filled with idiots who like didn't know how to execute a war. It's like imagine like as much of a warmonger piece of shit as he was. Like imagine saying George H.W. Bush was dumb. Like that's just so crazy to me. That's such a level of arrogance. One other wrinkle I'll throw in there is I think it's they think the previous guys were dumb, which like George W. Bush sort of cosplay being dumb. Of course, he was like Ivy League

education. One other wrinkle I'll throw in there is I think it's they think the previous guys were dumb, which like George W. Bush sort of cosplayed being dumb. Of course, he was like Ivy League educated or whatever. But another thing that I think people like Hegeseth believe, I think there's a sort of like tapestry of different ideologies in here, right? You've got your Marco Rubio's who is just an imperialist, J.D. Vance, who pretends to be anti-war.

But I think guys like Pete Hegseth think that the wars of the past were sort of hamstrung

because of things like rules of engagement being gay and woke or something.

That seems to be his ideology, is that like our quote-unquote war fighters of the past were held back and couldn't win in Iraq because Dick Cheney supports wokeness or something. Like that seems to be their explanation, right? Massive lethality, not tep and legality, blah, blah, blah, blah, not politically correct. Like, come, come on. He comes out and he just says it, dude. Like, I think guys like Pete Hegseth, guys who actually, like, have power here

...