Welcome to Nobody Told Me. I'm Laura Owens. And I'm Jan Black. Have you ever wished you could set

healthier boundaries with your family, friends, co-workers, and others in your

life? Do you feel your mental health has suffered because of a lack of healthy boundaries in

various aspects of your life? Well, if so, you'll get some great suggestions from our guest on this

episode, Relationship Therapist Nedra Glover-Tawab. She's the author of the new book, Set Boundaries, Find Peace,

a guide to reclaiming yourself. Nedra, thank you so much for joining us.

Thank you so much for having me, Lauren Jan. We were so excited when we saw your book and

we knew we had to talk with you. And wonder why you decided to write this book in the first place.

What motivated you?

For many, many years, I have been practicing with my clients.

I'm learning how to implement and set boundaries.

And that's in marriage, that's at work with their children, with family, and so many other areas.

And I wanted to share what I've learned and what I've taught others in a book. You say that most relationship problems come from a lack of

boundaries, but I found that either you don't think you'll need them initially or it's awkward

to set them. How can we actually set them and

stick to them from the start? Yeah. So in new relationships, it's typically easier because you're

getting to know each other so you can say outright that, hey, I don't like people to just pop up at

my house. It's the relationships we've been in for a while

that are a bit more complicated to set those boundaries, particularly family. We've had those

relationships so long, and it's hard for us to figure out ways to restructure them, but it is

absolutely possible. As we grow and

change, so do our boundaries. And just like other things in our life, we changed. And so letting people

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