The 25-year-old Lake City man allegedly proved that you don't need pockets to pull

off a robbery – just a face covering, a weapon, and zero shame, along with zero clothes.

I'm Darren Marler, and this is Weird Dark News.

Some crimes are meticulously planned, others are crimes of passion.

And then there's the kind that makes you wonder if the perpetrator lost a bet, took a very

wrong turn on the way to a nudist

colony, or simply decided that pants are an unnecessary complication in the commission of an armed

robbery.

In late December 2025, a small meat market in Northern Florida became the site of what

has to be one of the most logically confusing heists

in the Sunshine States' already colorful criminal history.

On the evening at December 23rd, 2025, employees at BJ's Meat Market, located at 837

Northwest Main Boulevard in Lake City, Florida, called police to report an armed robbery.

What they described, when officers arrived, had to have required several repetitions to confirm.

A man had entered the store, he was carrying what appeared to be a weapon wrapped in cloth,

he broke into the cash box, snatched more than $1,000, and fled into the night.

Oh, and one other detail. He was completely

naked. Well, almost completely. He was wearing a mask, because identity protection matters,

even when nothing else is protected. Lake City is the county seat of Columbia County in

North Central Florida. The town is a population

of about 12,400 and is known as the Gateway to Florida due to its location at the junction

of Interstate's 75 and 10. The town has seen a lot in its nearly 200-year history. Spanish

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