My religious mother thinks my Pokemon cards are demonic tools to cast spells on people.

Okay, straight off the bat, I should warn you guys that there are no huge gotcha or payback

moments for this story, mostly because the entitled parent in question here is my own mother.

And honestly, I struggle to see if she's entitled or just

crazy. But considering how many things she's taken from me, I'd say entitled. Read on, and you'll

understand. I'd like to start by saying, I love my mother to death. But she's crazy as all heck. I grew up in a very religious family, and I myself am still a religious

man. But heck, my family is huge and has so many darned problems that not only do I have

am I the jerk content for days, but I think there is to some degree a necessary level of crazy

in my family anyway just to survive. Early on in my life, in grade school,

I learned just how annoyingly controlling and entitled my mother could be. Who here remembers the

mid to late 90s Pokemon card craze? In my old grade school days, Pokemon cards were like

fat stacks of cash, and Gameboys were like Lamborghinis. I had to bribe with food,

trade, suck up and bet my way into the world of Pokemon, just so I could have even the slightest

touch of the experience. I managed to get my hands on a few junk cards like Magycarp, and

something else the other kids didn't bother caring about. But finally, having Pokemon card was like winning the fricking lottery twice in the same day.

Q. Mother dearest. Did I mention my family were crazy religious? I still remember it to this day.

Watching the tattered confetti of my Pokemon cards catching in the wind as she tore them up and

threw them out of the window and

said, These devil cards will make you demon possessed. Do you want to get demon possessed and

eat your brothers and some crazy blood ritual sacrifice? Yeah, it really was that bad. Years later,

a friend sent me his Game Boy. His family was very well off, and of course mine was very, well,

not. I hid that machine as best as I could, far deep into the mess that was my room. But when I came

...