Hi, my name is Melissa Urban, and you're listening to Do the Thing, a

podcast where we explore what's been missing every time you've tried to make a change and make it stick. Today I'm

talking to licensed therapist and relationship expert Nedra Glover to Wab about something

I'm also an expert in. Self-Sabbatage. Nedra is a licensed clinical social worker in North Carolina, but I discovered her on

Instagram about a year ago and I have been hanging on her every word ever since.

A while back she shared an insightful post about self-sabbatage, something I have experienced

in my own life all too often.

I immediately hit her up with the request to explore the topic for Do The Thing, thinking

the timing would be perfect.

We are in the beginning of New Year's resolutions and the January Whole 30.

I think we can all relate to the idea of wanting something, like really wanting it, and then not being able to follow through.

Sometimes it's poor planning, sometimes it's timing, but sometimes we get in our own way.

And if this pattern comes up again and again and again,

you're self-sabotaging.

So why do we do it?

What does it look like?

And most important, how do we stop?

This conversation with Nedra was more impactful than I could have imagined.

I thought, thanks to years of therapy, resolving my trauma, and practicing the work of Byron

Katie, that I had ended my self-sabotaging ways once and for all.

But Nedra explains here that self-sabbatage isn't all dramatic exits and blowing up relationships.

There are so many subtle ways that we sink our own ships,

...