My Mormon Mission Gave me PTSD - Rian Anderson | Ep. 1922

Mormon Stories Podcast

Dr. John Dehlin

Religion & Spirituality

4.6 • 5.2K Ratings

🗓️ 29 July 2024

⏱️ 238 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

As the first to be “born in the covenant” to convert parents, Rian Anderson's world revolved around the Church, until her mission became a crucible of mental anguish and familial tension. Expecting her experience to be one based on love and service, Rian was instead met with strict rules, surveillance, and spiritual turmoil as she continually felt forced to act against her own conscience & integrity. As the oppressive atmosphere coupled with isolation due to the initial rise of COVID began to take its toll on her mental and physical health, Rian cherished her weekly calls with her family. That is, until her family’s mounting concern for Rian’s welfare coincided with their loss of faith in the church. As Rian battled depression and suicidal thoughts, her mission leaders' response was shocking: accusations of pride and instructions to cut ties with her doubting family.

Certain that their concern for Rian’s spiritual well-being was superior to the love her “fallen” family had to offer back home, her Mission President and his wife insert themselves as surrogate parents for the remainder of her mission and beyond. Despite this initial interference, Rian finds herself facing her own faith crisis. As she considers what the actions of her “mission parents” truly cost her, Rian discovers for herself the real meaning of family, and her family had it all along.

Transcript

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0:00.0	Hello everyone and welcome to another additional Mormon stories podcast I'm your host
0:04.0	John Delin it is July 23rd 2024 I'm here with my partner Margie hello and we have a blockbuster interview for you today.
0:17.4	Today we're gonna be interviewing
0:19.4	in our series of returned Mormon missionaries. we're going to be interviewing Ryan Anderson.
0:25.8	Hey Ryan?
0:26.8	Hi.
0:27.8	We're going to be covering all sorts of topics, including serving a mission during COVID, which we haven't really
0:34.6	covered so far. That was its own thing. We're also going to be talking about
0:38.6	mission presidents and trauma and dealing with a, you know, a family back home, having a faith crisis and even leaving the church
0:52.9	while you're on your mission.
0:54.7	We've covered this before, but this is its own story in that regard.
0:59.0	We're gonna talk about mental health issues on the mission.
1:02.0	We're gonna be talking about having a faith crisis on the mission. We're going to be talking about having a faith crisis on the mission.
1:05.0	And then we're going to be talking about coming home from a mission
1:07.7	while your family's pretty much out of the church,
1:09.5	but you're still apparently in the church and trying to navigate those waters and then of course just the
1:15.7	traditional rebuilding after your Mormon world falls apart those are some of the key themes that we're going to be talking about today.
1:25.3	Did I miss any key themes, Ryan?
1:27.8	I think that's spot on.
1:28.8	Yeah.
1:29.8	You've lived, Ryan.
1:31.8	That's right. Already. You've lived right already you've lived some yeah yes and do you consider yourself
	...

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