Mortician Adjacent Crime

Petty Crimes

Hartbeat

Comedy, True Crime

4.8 • 685 Ratings

🗓️ 15 October 2024

⏱️ 43 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Cadavers Cadavers Cadavers Petty Criminals! Do you have a crime that should be heard in the Petty Crimes Court? Submit it to our team by emailing us at [email protected]! And keep up with us on Instagram and TikTok for crime evidence, events, BTS and other general petty bullsh*t… Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	Mm-mm-mm. No. Spooky. This is the beginning of a horror movie because the security guard is a figure who you think you can trust, but you can't.
0:09.2	Just because the man is in a uniform, it doesn't mean he is not a sinister figure. Nope, nope, nope.
0:20.5	Welcome back to Petty Crimes, the only true crime comedy podcast that exclusively investigates non-crimes.
0:29.7	That was pretty good considering we're apart again.
0:35.0	I miss you. How are you, Griff? I'm good, but the team, I will say, has done a really good
0:40.6	job. Like, it kind of does feel like we're still in the same room, but we are, alas, not.
0:47.1	Oh, well. Oh, well. It smells better here. How are things in New York? How you're back there
0:53.8	doing the damn thing.
0:56.2	That's right.
0:57.2	It's right.
0:57.7	We got some television to write.
0:59.2	How are you?
0:59.6	What's new in your life?
1:01.2	I'm good.
1:02.3	I went on a date.
1:04.6	It went well.
1:06.1	And that's all I'm going to say about it because I'm putting good energy out.
1:12.6	I don't want to jinx it.
1:14.7	Balls.
1:15.4	Will you say more about it if I ask you on a Patreon episode?
1:17.6	Sure.
1:18.0	Yeah.
	...

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