Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, children of all ages, we proudly bring to you...

Mormonism...

LIVE!

Shut up and sit down!

Good evening, everyone. How are you doing? Mr. Real? What's that I can't hear you?

I said, how are you doing? Can you not hear me?

I'm a clapping stop. I could hear you fine.

I thought maybe I wasn't speaking loudly enough.

No, no, no. You're speaking plenty loud. How's life treating you?

Well, I will tell you it's very exciting. Lots going on. I'm wearing... I put on a jacket right before the show because it's so cold here.

I understand you're very cold down there in Utah, especially southern Utah as well.

But up here in the Pacific Northwest we're so cold we're bundling up. I need a survival jacket for crying out loud.

I'll tell you, it's 107 degrees today, I think, in southern Utah. So it's hot. But we've got our AC turn to 76, I think.

But because it's so hot outside, the AC runs nonstop in the office that I record and has a vent right next to me here.

And I'm a little bit chilly. I've got, in fact, I'm so chilly that I got my soft... You can't see it, but my little soft little shoes on...

They keep my little toesies warm, you know?

I'm just glad to see you're wearing pants this week.

Yeah, yeah. Last time I had shorts on when I got up to turn a light on or something.

And I was hoping nobody caught that at the level was just right, but you got me.

Oh my gosh. I'm getting ready to fly out right nearly tomorrow morning to Utah.

By the way, just so you know, I'm pranking you a little bit. It's in the 80s outside, but they've turned the thermostat so far down that actually a t-shirt is not enough to keep me going.

So I've got a coat on over it.

...