Monty’s Mexican Special Needs Zoo | The Aztecs (Part 3/5)

Fin vs History

Fin Taylor & Horatio Gould

Comedy

4.7 • 1K Ratings

🗓️ 16 June 2025

⏱️ 49 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Aztec Emperor Montezuma finally meets the Conquistador Cortes, but finds the Spaniard so weird he considers putting him in his zoo for disabled people The show for people who like history but don't care what actually happened. For weekly bonus episodes, ad-free listening and early access to series, become a Truther and sign up to the Patreon https://www.patreon.com/fintaylor?utm_campaign=creatorshare_creator Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	Imagine a delicious patty nestled between two buns with cheese and ketchup.
0:04.7	It's not a burger.
0:05.6	That patty is actually sausage, which makes this a sandwich.
0:08.6	A breakfast sausage sandwich, the new 199 sausage sandwich from McDonald's.
0:12.8	Made with RSPCA at short pork.
0:15.6	Until 11am.
0:16.6	Price and participation may vary.
0:17.8	Up charges and fees apply to delivery.
0:19.2	Subjects for availability.
0:33.3	Thank you. Price and participation may vary. Up charges and fees apply to delivery. Subjects of availability. Welcome back to Finn versus History.
0:35.0	I'm here with the ratio Gould.
0:36.4	Went early.
0:54.3	It went early. He's jumped the gun. Yeah. It's part three of our epic series on the Aztecs. Yes. The Mexica. Yeah. And some filthy gringoes have landed and they're making their way. Grotty little gringoes. Gringos from Spain. Erinan Cortez as disobeyed orders.
0:55.3	He's built a city.
1:11.1	And these merry band of bandits, right? Yeah. They're not that merry. They're quite rapy and killy. Rapy bandits. Yeah. And together with a slave girl called Melinche. Yeah. Which. Mimksi. The Minks Malinche. they have set out on,
1:11.7	they've heard pray tell of this city of gold.
1:14.4	Yes.
1:14.8	And, The mimksay. The minks, Malinche, they have set out on, they've heard, pray tell of this city of gold. Yes. Is this elder, this is not El Dorado, the actual myth, but it's not far off. I guess to them it must be El Dorado. What was the actual story of El Dorado? Where was the myth of El Dorado? It must have been somewhere else. But this is basically an El Dorado story. And they've, he set up his own city, Veracruz. Which isn't a city, it's just a dot on a map. It's a shanty town. It's like a surfing school. Yeah. There's body boarding classes, you know, for beginners. Yeah, Cortez is there, like just on the front, trying to paddle.
1:44.9	You ever surfed?
1:45.6	Hey?
1:46.0	You ever surf? I'm not a surfing man. No. I'm a floating man. I like nothing more than sitting in a lillo. Yeah. A big rubber ring. Your relationship with the sea is you go down to the channel and you have a binoculars and you're trying to stop the boats yourself. No, I am one of the boats
2:01.3	My relationship to sea
	...

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