Monday, 05.12.25

Church of Lazlo Podcasts

Audacy

Comedy

4.9 • 1.7K Ratings

🗓️ 12 May 2025

⏱️ 107 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

*KFC and flipping off the grandkids. AKA-Mother's Day at Slim's *Kansas man steals civil war cannon to pay off drug dealer. *Greek woman divorces husband after ChatGTP read his coffee grounds. *Great news! Trade deals with China and free jets from Qatar! *Science has determined the optimal "body count" and it's different for men and women. *California high school baseball team is in trouble for being racist little jerks. *Lil Wayne dumps his girlfriend...on Mother's Day!! *Lazlo says there's only one sex act that can lead to pregnancy.

Transcript

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0:00.0	The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the iniquities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men.
0:10.0	Blessed is he who in the name of charity and goodwill shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness.
0:17.0	For he is truly his brother's keeper and finder of lost children.
0:22.6	And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger,
0:29.6	those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers.
0:33.6	And you will know my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon me.
0:41.8	Ladies and gentlemen, the Church of Laslow has begun.
0:47.4	My man, how are you?
0:48.7	Man, I am great.
0:50.0	How are you?
0:50.5	Good.
0:51.4	You look good.
0:53.1	How was your weekend? How was your weekend? It wasn't bad at all. You know, a couple of Thanks. He was well. As always. How was your weekend there?
0:55.3	It wasn't bad at all.
0:56.3	You know, a couple of Royals games.
0:57.9	You know, life is good.
0:58.8	You did make it to a game?
1:00.2	Which one?
1:00.7	I went, uh...
1:02.0	Friday, maybe?
1:03.1	Yeah, Friday and Sunday.
1:04.1	Okay, good. So you get to see a win.
	...

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