What is failure?

What is failure?

My conclusion was that failure is like a byproduct of social expectations and as is success.

Could you talk to me a little bit about how

social expectations have made you feel like a failure?

Of course, I realised I had to define failure after I had launched a podcast called AdS fail

and I had written a book called AdS fail and then I kept getting asked this very reasonable question

and I realised I'd never come up with a satisfying definition for me.

So the definition I came up with in philosophy is that failure is what happens when life doesn't go according to plan

which totally taps into what you've just asked me about.

Because then you need to start to think, well where does the plan come from?

Is it genuinely my plan?

Is it genuinely what will make me happy?

Or is it what I've been told I should expect my life to be?

Because when I looked at some of my metrics for how my life should be and I put that in quotation marks,

it kind of came from like 1980s romcoms and patriarchal society in conditioning

and the idea that I'd been raised in the 80s to be a nice pleasant pliable girl

whereas boys were enabled to be mischievous and that was seen as kind of cute and charming.

And that led to me being an investment people pleaser, which I know is something that a lot of people have in this kind of industry

and it also led to me imagining that I wanted to be married and have children.

And that's what I tried to do.

And in my 30s I did get married to the wrong person, I ended up getting divorced

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