Good morning, everybody. I just had a jalapeno beef stick. And it's really put a pep in my step. The people that say that these chumps,

which I actually do like, tastes like slim gyms, never had a slim gym. The highlight of my career

thus far, besides sitting in Times Square waiting for a billboard that never was approximately a year ago,

was when I got my first PR package, which was an expired lot of slim jims that all had

expired like three years prior.

And when I tell you in that moment that I thought I had made it with my cottage cheese ceilings and my

repossessed car, but in a whole box of expired slim gyms, that was, I mean, that was it for me.

That was peak Jackie Schimel.

And I did a video about it.

I got to find it.

I'll post it.

Let's talk about Megan Markle because it's all anybody

wants to talk about. Now, in true fashion, I have not watched the show, but I've seen

seven million clips on TikTok and I feel informed enough to tackle it. I have been saving it

because I want to watch it with a martini this weekend.

And I was just very social this weekend, so I didn't get around to it.

But my takeaway is that Megan Markle, she loves a drizzle and she loves a microgreen and an edible flower to boot.

And she likes to make ordinary things.

Wonderful.

It's something about the little giggle that puts me in the fucking ground.

Is Megan Markle inseparable or are we just cunts?

A case study by Jackie Schimmel.

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