Headspace Studios.

Hey friends, it's Rosie.

Welcome back to Radio Headspace.

When I was in the sixth grade, I went to three different elementary schools in one year.

My parents had separated and we were bouncing around trying to figure out where to live.

By the time I landed at the third school, I was withdrawn, quiet.

The kind of kid who kept her head down, hoping to just

get through the day unnoticed. But of course, that's when I met Anna. Anna was the girl at that

school, popular, confident, magnetic. Everyone wanted to be in her orbit. And at first, she let me in.

She asked me questions and made me feel seen. And for a moment, I thought, finally, a friend.

But what she was really doing was collecting information.

Within weeks, she was using my answers as ammunition.

She and her group of friends would decide on any given day whether I was in or out.

Some mornings, they'd walk with me, laugh with me, act like we were close.

Other days, they'd ignore me completely, whispering, laughing, pretending I didn't exist.

And to my 11-year-old mind, it felt like it was all my fault.

Sharon Salzberg and Robert Thurman, in their book, Love Your Enemies,

describe the outer enemy as those people, institutions, or situations that cause us harm.

Bullies are the clearest example.

They thrive on exclusion, humiliation, and control.

And when we're on the receiving end,

it's easy to collapse into victimhood.

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