The McElroy brothers are not experts, and their advice should never be followed.

Travis insists he's a sexpert, but if there's a degree on his wall, I haven't seen it.

Also, this show isn't for kids, which I mentioned only so the babies out there will know how cool

they are for listening. What's up, you cool baby?

We're coming to you today. We're coming to you today. So loud. So loud.

The quieter still? Yeah. Oh, oh, oh, oh, hello. Travis, drink this oyster water.

Thank you. Hello, everybody. Welcome. Welcome to my brother, my brother, maybe.

It's an advice show about quiet people, for quiet people who don't make a ruckus and don't turn on the

light for the love of God. Just leave it off. I know it's dark in here. Sit down on this

futon and relax. Um, I know this is bleeding. Oh, that's bad. That's bad. It's green. That's not

the worst. That's the worst yet authentic. That's a lot of food coloring in your diet. You had to

put it in there. I am wearing five sleep masks. So loud. So loud. Please just ever

can we all just be quiet? It's the day after St. Patrick's Day and Travis and Griffin are really hung

over. And I'm sort of hung over because I was cleaning up pet stains all night with my

most bought, bought by Bissle. So I guess we all had pretty crazy nights. This is an advice show

for the modern era. I guess our first piece of advice is don't don't drink. Don't have a drink.

Don't have that drink. I had I had six I had six sore teeth last night. No Griffin. No six of them.

Barton was just like you won't anymore. I said yes one more and I did that five times after the

first one. I had eight baby makers. Oh, wow. That's the one that has that actually has turpentine

in it. Does it? Yep. It's like a boiler maker but you drop in a shot of turpentine. Yeah, I had

I was only supposed to use one third parts pet stain remover to water. And I said

what if I did half and half? You said these are some these are some hearty stains. And you burned

...