The McElroy brothers are not experts, and their advice should never be followed.

Travis insists he's a sexpert, but if there's a degree on his wall, I haven't seen it.

Also, this show isn't for kids, which I mentioned only so the babies out there will know how cool

they are for listening. What's up, you've cool baby.

Hello everybody, welcome to my brother, my brother and me, and the vice show for the

modern era. I'm your oldest brother, Justin McElroy. I'm your middleist brother, Travis McElroy.

I'm the baby. I haven't said middleist, but I'm not. You're not. I'm not the middleist.

I'm a little bit of a coppy right and friend. Coppy right and friend, your copy right,

burglar, griffin, McElroy. We're back with another episode of our advice podcast. It's a little late.

It's been a kind of a spend a day. It's been a few days.

What happened? It's been a harrowing five days.

Okay, so let me give you my story real quick. Saturday morning is the day before my birthday,

and oh my god, my baby is puking every hour on the hour. And babies are rad when they puke,

because like human beings, adult human beings, if they've got puke, you see that look in their eyes,

like, oh god, oh god, not now. It's happening again. It's happening again. They make this run

for the bathroom. Babies are just like sitting watching little Einstein's chilling, and then they're

just puking on your chair and you and everything. And they don't really see that. Like Ben Ash,

they be about it. How rough and raw is baby puke? Because they're pretty little.

They can sun in the mask when I think of baby puke so in time, and it comes out real fast and hard,

and Jamie Kennedy is just like wearing it. It's weird because you really have to help babies out.

You know, like you hear the thing about real friend is somebody who holds your hair back while

you puke. For babies, you just like up in them over the tub or something. It's like you're holding

...