The McElroy brothers are not experts, and their advice should never be followed.

Travis insists he's a sexpert, but if there's a degree on his wall, I haven't seen it.

Also, this show isn't for kids, which I mentioned only so the babies out there will know how cool

they are for listening. What's up, you cool baby.

Hello everybody and welcome to my brother, my brother and me, and an advice show for the modern era.

I'm your oldest brother, Justin McElroy. I'm your middle-aged brother, Travis McElroy.

I'm your baby-est baby baby, Griffin McElroy. Ladies and gentlemen, we're here with a breaking,

not really breaking, breaking update from the CBN news desk, and that is the Cake Boss news,

news desk. A hot story from the great state of New Jersey. New Jersey, just still trying to get

all of the particulars in order. Here's what we do now right now. Cake Boss was arrested on DWI charges

in Manhattan driving, a swarving round near Hudson Yards. DWI, of course standing for driving while

I'm the Cake Boss. Right? Just so you know, prosecutors say that when arrested, the Cake Boss said,

and this is not a goof, this is not us generating the story. Travis, do you know this? Do you know what he said?

You can't arrest me. I'm the Cake Boss. You can't arrest me. I'm the Cake Boss, which would have

been great if all the police officers had all gone, oh shit, you're right. I forgot about that.

He's got diplomatic community, guys. He mastered cake. We forgot about Roe v. Betty Crocker.

His life has officially become the first act of a Nicholas Cage movie.

Like, whether man, family man, cake man, this is the third of his man trilogy.

Now, to be fair, it actually is a case without precedent because he was driving a car that was

actually a cake that he baked. Yeah. So it's not like, how do you get a Corvette cake up to like 80?

I think that's impressive enough. He stepped out of the cake car, fucking sloshed,

fucking slaughtered. It's a wrong cake car. And then the police officers were like,

...