May 7, 2009 – Part 1
TBTL: Too Beautiful To Live
TBTL
4.8 • 2.4K Ratings
🗓️ 7 May 2009
⏱️ 39 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Welcome to the show: I want the chicken! (more tales from Oprah's giveaway)
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | T-B-T-L. Pity in that food and roll in that boo for 28 years. On 97-3 cry room. |
| 0:08.5 | Mom, Dad, I got a little surprise for the two of you. I think I might just buy you a 30-room |
| 0:13.7 | mansion in Beverly Hills, California, complete with pushbutton phones. Look at this face. What do you |
| 0:18.7 | see? Look at it, Dad. What do you see? What do you see? Say it. Say it. Hey, it's a face. Yeah, |
| 0:25.6 | but what kind of face? Well, pale, pasty, psychotic. No, Dad. It's a neatly chiseled, |
| 0:33.3 | well-groomed, drop-dead, handsome face. I'm going to become a male model. Oh, you know, |
| 0:39.2 | of course, you can't just walk into the glamorous, high-paying world of male modeling. It takes |
| 0:44.3 | hard work. It takes dedication. And a semi-moderate amount of attractiveness. |
| 0:50.0 | That's what they said about hosting a radio show. |
| 0:53.0 | But here we sit, presenting you with a Thursday night edition of TVTL, the show that's probably |
| 0:58.6 | too beautiful to live. You know what you need to do? You need to go into your closet, |
| 1:02.4 | and you need to hygo your life. You need to peak yellow green orange. It has yourself, all right? |
| 1:07.6 | Indeed. I'm your host, Luke Burbank, weighing in at 184 pounds. |
| 1:13.2 | It's working. It's working. And it continues to, coolio. Thank you very much for your support |
| 1:21.0 | in my struggle to lose 15 pounds in 29 days. It sounds like a Josh Hartnett movie, |
| 1:27.8 | and maybe it will be someday after my successful weight loss is finally recognized for the Hollywood |
| 1:33.6 | gold that it is, speaking of things that are probably destined to be a runaway success. |
| 1:40.2 | Hi, this is Luke's mom, Suzy coming tonight on TVTL. |
| 1:44.0 | You ever pick out an outfit and think to yourself, this looks amazing. |
| 1:50.3 | And then you leave the house, you go somewhere important, and you look down and realize, |
| 1:56.4 | oh no, it doesn't. This is embarrassing. You ever have that happen on live national television? |
| 2:02.6 | Amy Poler did last night. We'll tell you about that at 720. |
... |
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