Mammal Math & Stadium Slapstick | 470
Hysteria 51
ForthHand Media
4.4 • 1.2K Ratings
🗓️ 14 January 2026
⏱️ 31 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
This week on Hysteria 51, we’re tackling two stories that prove nature and sports both have a wildly unhinged sense of humor.
First up: science says blocking reproduction may be linked to longer lifespans in mammals—with a large analysis across 117 species suggesting animals that were sterilized or given contraception lived about 10% longer on average. It’s the ultimate “live long and prosper” headline… with a twist that’ll make every mammal in the room cross its legs and reconsider its life choices.
Then we pivot to baseball’s most statistically improbable “sorry about your face” moment: the legendary tale of Phillies great Richie Ashburn, who once hit a foul ball that struck a fan—and then struck the same fan again during the same at-bat as she was being carried away. It’s slapstick destiny, but with stadium seating.
So if you like your weird news podcast with longevity science, evolutionary trade-offs, and a side of baseball history so absurd it sounds invented, hit play and let’s get strange.
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | The following is a fourth-hand production. |
| 0:10.0 | What's up, Nation? |
| 0:10.9 | How's it going, everybody? |
| 0:13.9 | Brent is over there. |
| 0:15.8 | I'm over somewhere. |
| 0:17.9 | Davis Flores. |
| 0:20.2 | Oh, Davida Floridian |
| 0:22.6 | I think it's out |
| 0:23.7 | This is |
| 0:24.6 | This is blurry hysteria |
| 0:27.2 | Yeah we got some weird |
| 0:28.6 | News coming to you |
| 0:30.2 | And don't forget kids |
| 0:31.2 | Cats and kittens |
| 0:32.3 | You can get your weird news to us |
| 0:34.2 | Weird at Hysteria 51.com |
| 0:37.3 | WIRD at Hysteria51com. W-I-R-D at Hysteria-51.com. |
| 0:40.0 | And voicemail, 773-669-7-2-7. |
| 0:43.2 | Again, 773-669, 7-2-77. |
| 0:46.8 | Or just go to Hysteriaf51.com, click the microphone. |
| 0:49.1 | You can leave it that way. |
| 0:50.7 | And you can get your life ruined by us talking about you or your things, your things. |
... |
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