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How To Fail With Elizabeth Day

Malala Yousafzai - I Am Not Who You Think I Am

How To Fail With Elizabeth Day

Sony Music

Society & Culture

4.89.4K Ratings

🗓️ 5 November 2025

⏱️ 57 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

You might think you know about Malala. But you’d be wrong. For so many years, she stood as a symbol of resistance: the teenage girl who was shot by the Taliban for insisting on the right to go to school and who later won the Nobel Prize at 17 for her efforts to make education available for everyone. But there was another story that existed behind the headlines: the story of a young woman who was only just understanding who she was. Now 28, Malala has published a new book, Finding My Way which describes some of that extraordinary journey. In this episode we discuss her panic attack after smoking a bong at Oxford (and how this retriggered undiagnosed PTSD), what friendship taught her, her views on marriage and how they’ve changed, as well as the sadness she carries for Afghanistan and all the women who are denied an education around the world. Plus: how she fell in love with a hot cricketer. This is such a powerful conversation and Malala is also funny, warm and incredibly wise. You will laugh. You might cry. But whatever happens, you’ll emerge with a new perspective on life. ✨ IN THIS EPISODE: 00:00 Introduction 01:27 Recovery and Continued Education 05:12 College Life and First Experiences 07:03 Mental Health and Panic Attack 11:09 Academic Struggles and Social Life 17:48 Reflections on Friendship and Cultural Pressures 26:02 Reflecting on Nasin's (her cousin’s) Struggles 27:49 Reflections on Life Choices 30:14 Marriage: A Journey of Doubts and Discoveries 31:47 Redefining Marriage Norms 34:36 Contemplating Motherhood 37:04 The Fall of Afghanistan to the Taliban 44:27 Global Crises and Personal Reflections 💬 QUOTES TO REMEMBER: I realised that my learning was not limited to just reading articles and books. It's really your friends who make you comfortable because they don't judge you. They don't see you with any title. They see you beyond all of that. What you wear is your choice. Nobody should be deciding that for you and we need to give more freedom to women to make these decisions for themselves and respect their decisions… It is okay to question these things to take your time, and in the end, whatever decision you make for yourself, that is your choice. The fall of Afghanistan to the Taliban is a story of failure to me, failure of all of us. 🔗 LINKS + MENTIONS: The Malala Fund - www.malala.org Join the How To Fail community: https://howtofail.supportingcast.fm/#content Elizabeth’s Substack: https://theelizabethday.substack.com/ 📚 WANT MORE? Greta Thunberg - Greta talked about her inability to be a “normal teenager”, her frustration with the lack of political action on the climate crisis, and how she copes with being thrust into the global spotlight. http://swap.fm/l/GretaThunberg Kazuo Ishiguro - a fellow Nobel Laureate talks about outsidership, writing The Remains of the Day and why he’ll never forget a toy chicken. https://link.chtbl.com/zu0kLq-0 💌 LOVE THIS EPISODE? Subscribe on Spotify, Apple or wherever you get your podcasts Leave a 5⭐ review – it helps more people discover these stories 👋 Follow How To Fail & Elizabeth: Instagram: @elizabday TikTok: @howtofailpod Podcast Instagram: @howtofailpod Website: www.elizabethday.org Elizabeth and Malala answer YOUR questions in our subscriber series, Failing with Friends. Join our community of subscribers here: howtofailpod.com Have a failure you’re trying to work through for Elizabeth to discuss? Click here to get in touch: howtofailpod.com Production & Post Production Coordinator: Eric Ryan Engineer: Matias Torres Assistant Producer: Suhaar Ali Senior Producer: Hannah Talbot Executive Producer: Carly Maile How to Fail is an Elizabeth Day and Sony Music Entertainment Production. Find more great podcasts from Sony Music Entertainment at sonymusic.com/podcasts To bring your brand to life in this podcast, email [email protected] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

I find it so funny when I go on my TikTok or Instagram comments and I see these comments from Gen Z and Gen Alpha saying to me that they thought I was like a dead figure from 19 something 40s.

0:13.0

And I felt like I was reliving the attack that had happened to me when I was 15, when the Taliban shot me, what was really challenging about the panic

0:22.8

attack, which was associated with trying bong for the first time. I had never heard what

0:27.5

bong was. Yeah, that's right, listeners. Milala smoked a bong. Yes. Hello and welcome to

0:33.7

How to Fail. This is the podcast that firmly believes there is no growth without failure.

0:42.4

Life's been full on lately in the best possible way. I've just wrapped up a world-win national tour for my latest book.

0:48.9

And while it's been an incredible experience, it's also been kind of exhausting.

0:53.6

And honestly, I know I'm not alone

0:55.7

and feeling like there just aren't enough hours in the day. Between work, family, friends,

1:00.4

and the general chaos of being an adult, even finding time to eat properly can feel like a luxury.

1:06.6

That's where Uber Eats steps in, because let's be real, adulting is a lot.

1:13.3

Uber Eats gives me one fewer thing to worry about.

1:16.2

It's fast, easy and means you can actually enjoy a moment of calm, even if it's just flopping on the sofa in peace.

1:23.5

So next time you're feeling like you've done just enough, let Uber Eats take care of the rest.

1:28.9

When you've done enough, order some food on Uber Eats.

1:32.7

How to Fail is partnering with Bumble to bring your second chance love stories to life.

1:38.6

Hear how this happy couple hit it off after they met on Bumble.

1:42.5

So I wanted to tell you about meeting my handsome

1:45.4

partner because we met in an app. It was actually quite funny because it was kind of live

1:52.3

at first sight actually. So kind of weird really how much the world has found its rhythm

1:58.4

with meeting people that maybe your path would never cross in a normal life,

2:04.1

even though me and my now boyfriend only live 15 minutes drive away, but had never come across

...

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