Good evening, everybody. Welcome to the show. Got a great show plan for you. I'm going to be hitting a topic that we talked about this a couple years ago. It's so wild to say that. Chemistry versus compatibility. I know. We talked about that a couple years ago. I mentioned it a few times quickly. And actually, two different people, doesn't sound like a big number, but often people come at me with different topics.

But two people last week had actually asked me to circle back and talk about it because I guess I had referenced it quickly.

And they were like, hey, go back through that.

Of course, we are channel Q.com is where you can find past episodes.

We'll do a little bit of a crash course in it. I think it's an important topic as people get divorced, people reenter the

dating world, people are newly single, people are opening up their relationships, stepping

into different kind of styles and configurations. And I think it's also something that people

that are already in a long term or committed relationship can also benefit from by looking at

what might be lacking within these concepts and how to kind of amp that up or bring that back in.

Again, all my topics are applicable to everyone and everything.

You just have to sometimes get creative

and understanding that.

Although I'm using one entry point,

it doesn't mean it can't necessarily apply

in a more ubiquitous way.

So let's kind of just jump right in.

I think this is such an exciting topic at the same time. I mean, I like to think all the topics I talk about are exciting. You know, I don't talk about things that I think are boring. Anyway, here we go. So chemistry versus compatibility. There are two processes that are very different and often get very confused. I notice that with general psychology, people are always collapsing

things that maybe are completely separate into the same thing. So just very quick shorthand,

chemistry is something that when we're talking about chemistry, we're talking about desire,

we're talking about attraction, we're talking about arousal, we're talking about hunger for someone.

That's chemistry. It's the constellation of all those things that draw us towards someone, make us interested in them. It's that energy, that spice, that fire. Compatibility is kind of outside of that. And that's really about their attachment style, their relational orientation, the intimacy needs they have, how much intimacy

they want, how they deal with conflict, what happens when two people's nervous systems or

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