Loveline 4-20-22
Loveline with Dr. Chris
Audacy
4.0 • 803 Ratings
🗓️ 21 April 2022
⏱️ 53 minutes
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Summary
Clingy-ness as an attachment style
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Good evening, everybody. Welcome to the show. We got a great show plan for you. We're going to be talking about how to heal, work with anxious attachment style. |
| 0:09.3 | That is because I'm seeing more and more of that coming through my clinical doors, more and more questions about it in my DMs. |
| 0:14.7 | And it tends to be one of the more prevalent relational styles. We've talked on the show about attachment theory, |
| 0:22.5 | and you're going to hear more and more about it in culture, pop psychology. |
| 0:25.9 | There's lots of IG pages centered in it. |
| 0:28.2 | And for those not familiar with that word, |
| 0:29.6 | it tends to be those people that struggle with a lot of emotional regulation. |
| 0:34.1 | They tend to be perceived as clingy and needy, |
| 0:40.2 | always fearing abandonment, |
| 0:47.1 | um, always worried or anxious when they haven't been connected with or heard from their partner. And, um, that's why we call it anxious attachment. Their relational style is one of |
| 0:53.2 | anxiety. They never seem like they feel anxiety. They never seem like they feel |
| 0:55.3 | safe. They never seem like they feel confident. Nothing ever seems to be enough. And remember, |
| 1:02.0 | this isn't a mental health illness or disorder. It's the outcome of all the different kinds of |
| 1:08.7 | relationships that this person has been a part of. |
| 1:10.8 | Because remember, in our early relational life, that's when these things get set in place. |
| 1:15.3 | But there's still a flexibility to them. These are not rigid, enduring, everlasting, never |
| 1:20.7 | changing, or changeable things. In fact, we talk about earned secure attachment, because |
| 1:25.5 | secure attachment would be the people that are very confident, they're very chill, they make their needs known, they can roll with the punches. |
| 1:31.1 | That's what we're looking for. |
| 1:32.5 | That's the kind of partner you ideally want, and that's also the kind of partner you ideally want |
| 1:36.0 | to try to be. |
| 1:36.9 | And that can happen if you do the work. |
... |
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