Early one morning in April of 2016, I woke up and seriously contemplated the

possibility that I would never be able to generate the strength, focus, and

courage to get out of bed. The combination of crippling anxiety, chronic pain,

muscle atrophy, and the fascinating mix of pharmaceuticals coursing through

my body had, I feared, finally broken me. Those are the words of Congressman Adam

Smith, a Democrat from Washington State on the first page of his new book, Lost

and Broken. They are obviously not the usual canned remarks that you hear at a

stump speech or a fundraiser. In his book, Smith recounts in raw visceral

prose his deeply personal story of suffering through and eventually

overcoming debilitating mental and physical illness. We're going to talk to him

today about that difficult journey and some surprising lessons it taught him

about the emotional and sometimes dark overtones that are animating American

politics. I'm Ryan Liza, this is Playbook Deep Dive. Adam Smith grew up in a

working-class family that had more than its share of problems. Before

establishing himself in politics, Smith held a few tough guy jobs, such as

loading UPS trucks and prosecuting domestic abuse and drunk driving cases for the

city of Seattle. At the age of 25, Smith won a seat in the Washington State

Senate. A few years later, in 1996, he won a seat in Congress. Today, he's the

ranking Democrat on the House Armed Services Committee, where he has one big

job every year, helping write and pass the $850 billion defense budget. But in

his new book, Smith opens up about what other members of Congress shy away from,

the intense strain of the job on their private lives. I spoke to Smith early in

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