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And That's Why We Drink

Listener Stories: Vol. 114

And That's Why We Drink

Christine Schiefer, Em Schulz | Para Pods

True Crime, Society & Culture, Comedy

4.724.1K Ratings

🗓️ 1 April 2026

⏱️ 65 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Welcome to April! Is it too late to pull a prank on everyone and just chat about Tai Chi for the entire episode? This month we're delving into alien and UFO encounters thanks to the suggestion from Patron Taylor, she/her. Join us for a wild and unidentified ride covering everything from unexplained bumps and lights to ominous timetables on West Virginia backroads. We're bringing you otherworldly vibes this April. And can anyone tell us the difference between alien implants and lawnmower shrapnel?? And that's why we drink...Refresh your spring wardrobe with Quince. Go to Quince.com/drink for free shipping and 365- day returns. Now available in Canada, too. 4 out of 5 employers who post on ZipRecruiter get a quality candidate within the first day. Try it FOR FREE at https://ZipRecruiter.com/drink Find furniture, decor, and essentials that fit your unique style and budget at https://wayfair.com.To explore coverage, visit https://www.aspcapetinsurance.com/DRINK. Eligibility restrictions apply. Visit ASPCAPETINSURANCE.com/AMAZONTERMS for more info. The ASPCA® is not an insurer and is not engaged in the business of insurance” in the description section of the video, whenever applicable/possible. Get 40% off select Lola Blankets products at Lolablankets.com by using code DRINK at checkout. Experience the world’s #1 blanket with Lola Blankets. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0

I am so mad because today was the day I was going to bring my Lola blanket upstairs with me, but then I took a nap this morning in my bed with it, and I just was like, oh, it belongs here, and I forgot. So anyway, one day. I will say the only thing better about my Lola than other Lola's is that mine constantly has a puppy on top of it. Oh, right. It's also machine washable, which just popped in my head because of cats, dogs, et cetera. Like, that's the best part. And children also. But, like, you just toss in the wash and it's clean and it's just as stretchy and fluffy and it's faux fur. But it feels like so luxurious. Oh, my gosh. No, Lola is definitely a go-to gift. If you have anybody in your life who wants

0:39.1

the joy of feeling cozy or soft or warm at night or protected by the most gentle cloth that the

0:47.4

angels knit themselves, then I get them a little of like it. It's truly wonderful.

0:53.1

What's wrong with you if you don't feel that way? You know what I mean? Like, go see a therapist. I know. For a limited time, our listeners can get 40% off select Lola Blankets products with Code Drink at checkout. Just head to LolaBlanckets.com and use Code Drink to get 40% off your order. After you purchase, they'll ask where you heard about them. please support our show and let them know that we sent you. Wrap yourself and luxury with Lola Blankets.

1:28.1

Oh, are we ready, I guess? I was just staring at my computer, like, waiting for something to happen. I still wait for, like, the teacher to come into the room and go, okay, it's time to begin, but no. Well, you have been taking a lot of classes, so you would be in the mindset of a student. I can understand that a little bit. I am. And my ASL class is definitely my favorite one I'm taking, but the teacher to get our attention is claps really loud. And to be fair, she is actually a heart of hearing. And so I don't think she realizes how loud the clap is. And so she, oh, I bet she does. Oh, I bet she doesn't. I bet she that's why she fucking does it. And it works. So she knows for sure it's working at least.

2:18.0

Wow. I'll start just, well, we do clap at the beginning of this. And it does usually just startle Gio out of his nap. So yeah, I try to, you know, I did Chi Gong yoga today. How was that? And did you go somewhere for that or was that in home? I went to the Y of the YMCA.

2:19.3

And?

2:19.9

I know.

2:18.0

I'm a proud member of the YMCA.

3:07.5

And? I know. I'm a proud member of the YMCA now as of today. And I'm so I, my mom has been like holding out on me for years. She like goes to the Y and she always framed it as just like, oh, a bunch of old people and I do like water aerobics and I'm. And I'm like, like, senior water aerobics. And I'm like, okay, cool. Well, I didn't know, like you get this YMCA thing. You can go to anyone in the greater Cincinnati area. They have like a crazy amount of like classes and pools and you can reserve everything on the app. And I'm like, what if I've been missing out here? So I did Qigong yoga with my mother. Was that fun? I watch watching her do plow, try, attempt to do plow pose was really remarkable. It's the one where you lay in your back and then you pull your, you put your toes over your head like that and hold your low back. And like, it's one of my favorites. And, and of course,

3:08.2

my mom is so competitive and she's a Leo.

3:10.1

And she's just,

3:10.8

she's a Leo, by the way, fuck me. She's a Leo son and a Leo rising. I found out last week. And I'm like, no wonder. And so she's over there, like, try not like, roll herself over. I'm like, we're going to end up in the emergency room if you try this any.

3:24.9

Like, you don't need to do plow pose right now. It's just. trying to like roll herself over. I'm like, we're going to end up in the emergency room if you try

3:24.3

this any. Like, you don't need to do plow pose right now. It's just you're okay. My mom and I are very, um, meant to be when it comes, like we're very different, but the second it comes to something like doing plow pose in front of others for the first time. We'll both look at each other and go, We can, let's just go to lunch.

3:41.9

Let's pack up.

3:42.8

I'm like, mom, look what I can do because I, in front of others for the first time. We'll both look at each other and go, we can, let's just

3:41.3

go to lunch. Let's pack up. I like, I'm like, mom, look what I can do because I just know it'll piss her right off. And she's just like, I can do it too. And I'm like, uh-huh. And then I'm like, please stop. You're going to hurt your. And she's very, she's very sporty. She's more active, far more active than I am. So I'm not like, you know, dissing her for that. But like, I'm like, man, if we're going to be doing Qigong and you're going to get competitive with me, like, I don't know. We're going to have a really weird spiritual experience. Like, I think this is about surrender and energy flow. but I guess if you're over there, like, trying to throw your legs over your head because I just did it and you have to prove it.

4:19.1

It's fascinating to me to hear what other people will do for the sake of competition.

4:23.3

Because, like, I, with my, if I don't know with confidence that all of us are bad and therefore what's the point?

4:30.4

Oh, 100%.% but like you could

4:32.5

not pay me to behave that like and i think i'm like learning so much about astrology and i'm like damn she is

...

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