So your girl finally went out. I finally went out. I finally put myself out there. And let me just tell you, I had the most fun ever. Yeah. Basically, I have not left my house now. I was saying like four weeks since I've been back for Miami. Generally, I've not left my house. And finally, my friend invited me to go out and I was just

like, you know what, let's just go out. And I went out, I went to Silver Lake to this one really

happening bar. And there were so many people there, so many cool looking people, very alternative

looking people. And it was such a vibe. I mean, I wasn't drinking. It was like a wine bar and I'm allergic to wine and I didn't feel like drinking. But it was such a vibe. I mean, I wasn't drinking. I, it was like a wine bar and I'm

allergic to wine and I didn't feel like drinking, but it was such a vibe. There was like so many men

there and so many men would look at me or start conversations with me. And I know it sounds so

silly, but I was actually surprised because I've been feeling kind of not great about myself.

And I think it's because, well, you know, you know, it's true, you know, like when someone makes you feel rejected or someone doesn't choose you, you end up working against yourself where you feel unattractive, even regardless of what's in front of the mirror or what other people think, like you feel unattractive. You don't feel good about yourself. And you also don't want to put yourself out there. You don't feel like getting to know someone again after being rejected. You're like, okay, I've had enough. And that's what I've been feeling. I mean, I haven't talked, spoken to a man in five months. Like, no eye contact, nothing. And as you know, a week or two ago, I texted wishing whatever, who gives a shit about

that random dude that I went out with for three months.

That literally is like not that long at all.

It's actually insane.

Now that I think about it, my mindset two weeks ago is so different from my current mindset.

Like, it's crazy how time or going out for one night will change your perspective completely.

So because I was not talking to any men for a full five months, then all I could think of sometimes was about that one guy.

Thinking is if three months of my life even meant anything.

Like now that I look back, I don't even, like, is that even considered dating?

I don't think so.

That's like three months of your life.

Like when you're about to meet your person, you're going to be with them forever for many, many years together.

So what's three measly months out of your life? It's nothing. It's literally nothing.

And I made it like such a big thing in my head. You know? Like I feel, guys, now that I'm,

which I'll tell you in a second

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