It's the radio segment that wants to make the Winter Olympics more fun to watch.

Okay.

Where in curling, instead of sliding heavy stones across the ice,

they want you to slide chubby babies with tiny helmets on.

Yes.

Definitely tuning in for that.

Sweep that ice.

It's laser stories.

Tummy time.

A segment where we read weird news stories around the globe just like everyone else does, except we've got a laser.

Those other tubby bubby's just don't.

This first laser story is out of a fan favorite, Florida.

A 32-year-old man named Alexander Baker DePue was feeling romantic.

So he decided to buy a bouquet of flowers and some chocolates for a dancer at a local strip club.

She doesn't like you.

I'm just going to tell you right now.

But she's so happy every time I come in and give her money, bro. I know. I know it feels that way. She might like him after she found out the flowers and chocolates cost Alexander $288. Whoa, those are like high-end flowers. So he's just bad with his money, too. Yeah. I'm going to say she'd rather have the cash. Yeah. but continue. And he paid for them with counterfeit funny money.

That's actually smart.

Wow, he better not be tipping with that as well.

The bills had the word replica written on them and said they were only to be used for motion pictures.

Oh, it's TV money.

Still, the clerk accepted it anyway, and Alexander was on his way.

...