Welcome to Love and Abuse Insights. This is an addendum to the regular show that you'll find scattered in between full episodes.

On Insights, I pick random emails that I haven't addressed yet and do my best to provide my insights and opinions.

Everything you hear on this show is for informational purposes only. Always seek a professional for your mental health and well-being.

Dear Paul, I can't express in words what I'm going through since I discovered your love and

abuse podcast a couple days ago. This comes at a time where I've almost given up on ever

feeling happy and comfortable in my own life again. I'm sure you hear that a lot, but it feels

like this podcast was made for me and my husband.

I would like to thank you for making me feel this way.

It's like your voice is saying what my subconscious has known all along and has been trying

to explain to me for ages, but just couldn't find the right words to get through to my foggy

brain.

I've been with my husband since the early 2000s and things were bad from the

beginning. I've tried moving to three different countries to make him happy. I've tried to change

my personality. I've made excuses and I've sought help in many places, but I've never been able to put

my finger on what was wrong or give it a name. I'm now just realizing that I am at the receiving end of an

emotionally and sometimes sexually abusive relationship and that his behavior is unacceptable.

I don't know yet what I'm going to make of this recently acquired knowledge, but I know that I

will no longer be a passive onlooker of my internal turmoil and being able to name it is already a huge relief.

There's one thing that has always kept me from taking drastic measures, and that is my fear of

exposing my two kids to the toxic manipulative side of their father that comes out when he

doesn't get what he wants. I know they're old enough to understand a lot,

but he is a master at making himself the victim and brushing off other people's needs and feelings

...