Kurt Metzger’s Claw Knowledge

The Jason Ellis Show

Jason Ellis

News, Society & Culture, Entertainment News, Comedy

5 • 4.3K Ratings

🗓️ 1 May 2024

⏱️ 92 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Jason and Tully are joined by stand-up comedian Kurt Metzger to discuss bald guys, Gay frogs, Limelight, Rush Limbaugh has a Tail, White Claws, Betel Nuts, Eating Cookie, Jason Is The Walrus, Working out jokes, Headlining, Ass CTE, Head injuries, Claw Knowledge, Politicians, RFK, CIA, NY vs LA, Financial advice, Blackout, Cup check, Alpha Boot Camp/Male Astrology, and Clint Eastwood. Magic Mind has a limited offer you can use now, that gets you up to 48% off your first subscription or 20% off one time purchases with code ELLIS at checkout You can claim it at: https://www.magicmind.com/ellis Visit BetterHelp.com/ELLIS today to get 10% off your first month. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	Oh no way everybody it's Jason Alice. I'm going on tour. I'm doing a comedy tour who wants to see me tell jokes
0:08.0	Hey Tulsa and Appleton, and Louisville.
0:13.8	I don't even think I've been to Louisville,
0:15.8	but I'm coming to Louisville,
0:17.5	and I'm gonna be in L, wait, I'm always in LA.
0:19.9	But I'm doing jokes there too.
0:21.6	Everybody, go to the Jason Alice.com check out the dates of
0:26.0	when I'm coming to your town to tell jokes to your face. Come on everybody has to go, you better go, if you leave that, if I do jokes and nobody, and you go,
0:37.0	oh man, I didn't know that you were going to be in Tacoma.
0:40.0	Well, wake up Tacoma, because I'm coming all over you.
0:46.0	Whoops. It's a vigorous smoke machine too.
0:55.0	And I'm an excellent scene.
0:58.0	And I'm an excellent scene.
1:00.0	You can't blend it in.
1:02.0	Handle the smoke? Is that a weight in it? No.
1:04.3	Just don't blow it or him he gets contact high. No, it's nicotine. That's okay.
1:09.5	You know, it doesn't... Thinking about doing that, but I'm not feel pointed it like everybody who's sober is like on those things and I'm like
1:17.8	Don't start jays why you forgot wind I say keep your wind here. Yeah, yeah
1:22.3	I do it's and every now and then that's that's my I'm afraid of them.
1:26.2	Well why? Because the withdrawals off of them. I don't know off. If there's withdrawals off them, then you must be eating a pack.
1:34.0	What are you saying? Xanix?
1:36.0	Not what? No. Oh, Zen!
	...

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