You're on the virtue.

All right, so Cassie was telling us about a week ago about her OCD and I don't think I realized it was heartbreaking.

Yeah, like how much it affected her and hurt her on a day to day because as she was telling us about her OCD,

she was literally crying about it because it consumes her life, right?

It's been really hard a couple of years. It really went into overdrive after the birth of my first child back in 2019.

I didn't really talk about it because it's not something.

I mean, I've come on here a couple times and talked about intrusive thoughts and a few things I'm dealing with,

but not at that level because it's embarrassing and I received criticism from some people who were close to me

when I let them know what was going on in anger and I think it's because they didn't understand.

And I think a lot of people when they hear about OCD, they think it's you know lighthearted.

I'm not judging those people, but it's often perceived as a joke or oh, you have to have the right number of

pens lined up and everything has to be perfect and that is one of the OCDs are like formane subsets,

not the one I deal with. And people don't get it and they don't understand that it's a mental health diagnosis.

And when you look at those rationality, it doesn't come into play.

So it's very hard to combat it, but it eats up a lot of my time and my mental energy and the feeling and the fear and the anxiety around it too,

that I'm going to do something that puts my family in harm's way or that germs are going to get into a part of the house,

that's specifically like trying to protect against that.

So male can't come in past a certain threshold and the household neither can packages.

We change our clothes if we've gone outside and sat somewhere, you can't bring those inside and sit on the couch in them.

Just different things like that and I'm trying to get better by exposing myself to, it's called repeated exposure therapy.

So my dog is a big, big, not thorn in my side, but like worry of mine because I know she goes out in the yard and walks through dirt and

dogs pee and poo outside and then they walk inside and the thought of those germs all over my house just drives me nuts.

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